Lying about affair

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  • #13422 Report

    Nemofish00
    Participant

    husband left me and 2 children 5months ago, no reason behind it, just excuses, accepted it and have been moving on for the children. Suspected an affair but husband always said no.. I got on with my life and believed him, big mistake

    However recently found out husband is seeing someone else from work, he was caught out entering her flat and seen parked here over night, I confronted him about why he was always down this particular road, at first he lied and said he parked there to just walk into town….then I told him I’d seen him leaving a house, he went red and looked ashamed, I told him I had always suspected an affair, but  had no evidence until now. Looking back I did find dark hairs in the family home, got an anonymous text saying he was seeing someone from work a week after he left, he was distant and on phone in run up to leaving….there were signs but nothing major to prove it

    I was upset and angry, this was new information and shows he has lied fur months. I couldn’t beleuve what I had heard, I was so upset so left our family home and went out leaving husband to babysit kids who were already in bed… I left my iPad running in record whilst I left our home to get some space,he dust know he was being recorded….. he rings the girl immediately and tells here he is sorry, he says I have find out, he says a few times ” I’m just going to tell her it started after a month”.. He was basically getting his story straight with her ……..he is now sticking to the story that he got with her a month after leaving. He is lying and lying and I know thus was going on long before he left. Nobody just leaves like he did and now I can see why he left and refused councelling and a trial separation, he always had her in mind or was going for her

     

    i hate his lies, he has managed to convince his family it happened a month after going but surely that can’t be that silly? This was going in long before he left even if it was just emotional it stil as affair. I can’t trust him now and feel dreadful that his family beleives him when he has been lying to all of us for months

    #13428 Report

    ourproject
    Participant

    I am sorry to hear that. It is awful what he has done. My ex-wife did something similar and I realised I was becoming this bitter person because of it. I hated her for what she did. The hatred was as if I was swallowing poison and expecting her to die. I eventually learned to forgive her, to let it go, not look back and move on and there really is peace in that. It probably hard to do right now  as you are in the eye of the storm but try work towards letting it go (forgiving doesn’t mean you accept what they done as being okay. It means you chose to not become bitter and chose to remove it from your hands).

    #13433 Report

    Nemofish00
    Participant

    Yes I totally agree, it’s still very raw from finding out about the affair! Did u file divorce under adultery or unreasonable behaviour?

    #13434 Report

    ourproject
    Participant

    Unreasonable behaviour as this was her condition in order to sign a financial clean break order

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)

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