Lock down control

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  • #39366 Report

    Betzy
    Participant

    Hello all, I’m stuck and really need some advice. In 2018 my partner of over 20 years was arrested from our home and not allowed back because of his abusive behaviour. A year and a half down the road we have finished in court. We have 3 children all at school (one has a serious medical condition) on the last court day he was offered extra contact with the younger two (they are all his) which he refused and wanted to stick to limited contact. He hasn’t payed a penny towards anything. When I’ve approached him about money he becomes very abusive and constantly blames me for everything. We can’t talk due to the nature of his crime and all communication is through WhatsApp. My question is because of lockdown and my child being very high risk, contact physical contact had to stop. They then (he lives with his parents) started calling everyday at bedtime saying very negative things which then left my youngest very distressed. I got her a phone for when she has contact to keep her safe but now they are FaceTiming her whenever they want which is causing huge distress for my other child he is not allowed to see as she feels he is back n the house. I’ve tried to block his number and unblock it every evening so she can talk with them but this hasn’t worked. I thought about a new SIM card for her friends and keep the old one for him. When on face time he is asking to look around the house. This can’t go on. Any ideas

    #39368 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    That sounds horrible

    A SIM card just for him would be a good idea. Remove that sim card until the next scheduled call and keep it in your purse so she can’t be guilted into accepting extra calls.

    Block him on facetime and any other social media you use.  Keep the call in one room with as blank a background as possible.

    #39398 Report

    Betzy
    Participant

    I think you’re absolutely right that at the moment she does feel guilty and wants to please everyone. Really tough. I’ve asked her today would she like to FaceTime her dad to give her the ownership and she has said that she doesn’t want to talk to them at the moment. I think  new SIM card is the way to go and just put all her friends on the new one and like you said put the old one back for the calls. Thanks

    • This reply was modified 7 months ago by GingerbreadJustine. Reason: removed formatting codes
Viewing 3 posts - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)

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