Hi i am divorced from my ex . 2 older kids and 14 and 11 year old . we were supposed to have 50:50 agreement with the 2 younger kids but ex has worked on them to the extent they live with him all the time now. I have a new boyfriend who my ex hates(blames him for our break up, yet we met after we had split) and the ex tells the kids allsorts to turn them against him and me . my boyfriend and I did live together for 5 months but i got my own flat in an attempt to win the kids back and to give us some space, things were strained after my son decided to be with my ex full time. I recently found out he had been texting and took an old girlfriend on a date , whilst i was working away on nights. I’ve tried to end it but he won’t finish with me. i feel trapped between my ex , the kids and this boyfriend,who frankly I don’t trust anymore.
Hi. It’s a difficult situation but it sounds like the new boyfriend is causing you problems. If your ex is blaming him and you don’t trust him anyway then you may be better off on your own. Your children may enjoy having time with just you. I would focus on yourself and your children and try not to let the boyfriend and the ex upset you. I hope you can work something out.
It doesn’t sound like the boyfriend or your husband are particularly good for you or your children. It seems to me that you moving out for five months was a great choice and I think your husband is cruel for not allowing you more access to your children.
My sensible head tells me you should focus on being alone and becoming the best you can be for your kids. However, I need to heed this advice myself too and am failing. I can fully appreciate how difficult it is to move on from relationships and how easy it is to become trapped in a relationship that is unhealthy for you. So, instead, I will suggest that you just keep your head held high and look after yourself. Take every day as it comes and try not to dwell on the past x
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