Leaving my husband. Where do i start?

[Florence1Participant]

Hi, I’m new to this forum. I’m desperately un happy with my husband and think I am ready to leave I just don’t know how? I have two beautiful boys 3yrs and 5 months old.
My husband is an extremely angry man. He loses his temper very easily. I never know what mood he is going to be in when he comes home from work. His behaviour makes me anxious In my own home. He acts like the perfect man around others but is totally different behind closed doors. He’s rude, arrogant and verbally abusive. He goes out drinking a lot. I have been told I am pathetic and a disgrace in front of my children many times. He is nasty to our eldest son. Laughs when he falls over, trips him up , says things like ‘You don’t love me. At least your brother loves me. Maybe i will love him more than you ’  He thinks that somehow myself and my family have turned my son against him. For some reason he can’t stand my family. And makes me so uncomfortable when we do things with them. Whenever i confront him about things he turns it all around on me and always brings my family into it. Saying i am just like my mum and I’m controlled and scared of her. This is not the case at all. I need to get my boys out of this environment. My eldest son is already showing signs of anger and I’d starting to misbehave. I have no money of my own. I’m on maternity leave but normally only work 3 days on minimum wage. I haven’t got a clue where to go or who to go to for help? Thank you for reading. Any advice would be much appreciated x

[Natalie2020Participant]

Hi,

My kids are the same ages and I recently left their father. You’ll be entitled to universal credit, I think there’s a helpline on this website that has more detailed info on what you’re entitled to.

Just wanted to say good luck and look after yourself. It’s really hard when someone’s been knocking down your confidence. your kids are lucky to have you, sending virtual hugs! X

[GothMamaParticipant]

I recently left my ex for emotional abuse that turned physical, my advice is contact Women’s Aid and speak to them about your situation – I found them extremely supportive and helpful.

I really hope this helps, I know how awful it can be. Wishing you all the best.

 

[RamblinjonParticipant]

Hi Florence, welcome to the forum.

It does very much sound as though you and children will be better off away from this man.

You can find the helpline number under ‘contact us’ at the bottom of the page, they will advise you regarding finances etc

Another resource I’d try is:

National domestic violence helpline 0808 2000 247

I say this because it is abuse how this man is treating you and your eldest, the helpline isn’t just for physical violence but any form of abuse. It’s a collaboration between Refuge and Woman’s Aid, having a look at their website should prove useful.

All the best

Mark

[Author]

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