Is paying towards our mortgage classed as maintenance

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  • #39842 Report


    Hi could anyone help please? My husband left our home approx 2yrs ago after an affair was discovered  he now lives with her. He pays 1/2 towards our mortgage and that’s it. Surely he should pay maintenance for our 13yr old son? He virtually doesn’t see him and he never stays over at his house.. I don’t want to put a claim for maintenance in if he is correct, last thing i want is for him to get angry and not even pay towards our mortgage. Any help or advice really appreciated

    #39846 Report


    Is the house in both your names?

    I know some people come to an arrangement over mortgage and maintenance as they don’t want to sell the house. But in reality you may have to sell the house.

    bottom line is mortgage isn’t maintenance… but get some free advice from citizens advice- or a most solicitors do an hours free advice. Also has an impact if you are married or not.

    #39852 Report


    Hiya thanks for your help. Yes the mortgage is in both our names, we are officially still married but separated. I dont want to officially apply to csa if it wont benefit me (im sure it will) just incase i shoot myself in the foot and he then refused to pay his 1/2 of mortgage out of spite.

    #39855 Report


    Hello hayfever 1.

    I’m in a similar situation to yourself.

    From what I understand paying child maintenance is a legal requirement. I’ve had lots of conflicting advice about whether my ex needs to pay his half of the mortgage; he is named on the mortgage as am I.

    Long story short, we’ve now come to an agreement about how his half of the mortgage and child maintenance will get paid. There have been many months since he left when he hasn’t  paid either.

    Have you heard of a Mesher Order?


    #39858 Report


    He should be paying 12% per week of his weekly income for child Maintenance and that’s just for your sons living costs,this does not include clothes or after school activities which cost money,yes he is paying half the mortgage but this has nothing to do with child maintenance as he needs to contribute to providing a roof over your sons head until he starts working full time

    #39860 Report



    I don’t want to sound negative but I’m going through this at the moment and he doesn’t have to pay the mortgage so I would be careful.

    He doesn’t live in the house anymore so your expected to pay the mortgage when you get divorced he can ask for his share of the house if he doesn’t before

    He should pay maintenance but I would be careful incase you rock the boat.Try talking to him first.

    Mesher orders are very hard to get now and very expensive.

    Lots of solicitors do a first appointment for a fixed fee you should get some advice

    Good Luck

    #39887 Report


    I would defo seek the advice of a solicitor who can give you tailored advice to your specific situation and who can look over the mortgage you have taken out together and talk you through your options.

    #39905 Report


    Hi I’m new to this group. My ex paid the mortgage, and I didn’t apply for maintenance. He was working cash in hand, so the Solicitor’s advice was that he would only be paying a mere £7.00 a week from his benefits, for our then dependant 3 children. It wasn’t a legal agreement, but him paying the mortgage was a better option for me than him paying maintenance. The house was solely in his name, so the obligation of the mortgage ultimately fell on him. However, he stopped paying in 2016. In order to keep the roof over our heads, I carried on with his mortgage payments, until quite recently. The house was eventually sold, and due to the fact that I had up kept mortgage payments, I was entitled to some money from the sale – enough to clear my debts, even if I wasn’t on the deeds.

    Hope this information is of some help to you

    #39917 Report


    Thanks everyone. I think by the sounds of it i am entitled to maintenance and he has got off lightly these last couple of years. He has scared me into thinking i should be grateful for 1/2 towards the mortgage but i know in 5yrs once the house is paid off he will demand it goes up for sale so really he is just paying towards a sort of savings fund. I think i will ring the child support agency this week and get the ball rolling. Its the principle more than anything, he is 1/2 his responsibility so he should contribute financially towards what our son needs.

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