Bit of a long winded story but I’ll try to keep it as short as possible!
I’m a single parent to a 13 year old girl and I’ve brought her up on my own since she was born.
Her father and I were in a casual relationship and when I fell pregnant we mutually agreed that I would move back to my hometown to bring her up on my own.
I never asked for any financial help so have literally had no help from the father at all.
I moved back to my hometown and he returned to the Czech Republic where he is from.
About 4 years ago he did get in touch to see how our daughter was and maybe arrange a meet up but it never materialised and we heard no more from him.
Last week he has contacted me again to say he would like to meet her. I have told him that it’s entirely up to my daughter whether she wants to or not. There is no bad feeling from me at all and I actually would love for her to meet him but I am concerned he’ll meet her then not bother contacting her again which I think would be horrible for her.
I’m just wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation and can offer any advice.
Thanks for taking the time to read!
I can’t offer any advice, but I would love to hear what people suggest. This topic weighs heavy on my mind.
my situation is very different from yours. But I know her dad will show up one day (when she’s 16 or 18) she’s only 4 now.
Or the other scenario when she asks to see him, (he’s no secret to her) I’ve decided when she’s 10-11 (depending on maturity, going by the courts age and taking a child’s opinion into account) I will go through the correct channels and make sure my child is supported meeting her dad, I haven’t really looked into this, as it’s way in the future. But I think a professional needs to be there to oversee a meet and offer both you and your child support.
maybe the helpline could give you some signposts. The last thing you want is a private meet that affects your child in a negative way.
I am also interested in this and totally understand your fears Cloli, as wouldn’t it be awful if your daughter opens herself up to a relationship with her father but then he lets her down? Like Lulublue my situation is different, but my fear is that my child’s father might want to get involved in her life one day, only to cause her hurt or let her down just like he did me. But of course, there’s only so much I can do to prepare and protect her from such things, and maybe what happened in the past is just that and not necessarily fated to happen again in the future…well, we can have hope at least.
Best wishes both, that the fathers are now older and so wiser and hopefully more kind/considerate/caring.
Privacy & Cookies Policy
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.
Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.