Hello, this is a bit of an awkward situation. I recently met my ex’s new partner (they’ve been together 6 months or so). I got on really well with her, I’m really happy for them both. There is no animosity between me and my ex.
However, when the new partner dropped my child off the other day, and said to my child as they were leaving to come give her a hug and kiss.
I have always said to people who have said that to my child that they shouldn’t demand it, they should ask for a hug or kiss, it should be their choice and if they didn’t want to then that’s fine (as an adult I would never want to be forced into hugging and kissing someone).
Well the bit that really rang alarm bells is the fact she then proceeded to kiss my child on the lips. I found it very inappropriate.
I want to raise it with my ex but I just feel it’s so awkward as I’ve just met this person and don’t want there to be any negativity between us. I don’t think my child is in any danger, but do think the kissing on the lips isn’t appropriate. I wouldn’t allow that from any new partner of mine.
Am I overreacting? Do you have any advise on how to bring this up?
I’m thinking this depends on how we have each been brought up by our own parents. For some it would be normal, others less so. I’m not sure you can read anything sinister into it (not that you necessarily did) but if it makes you uncomfortable then I think you’re entitled to make that known in a respectful way.
Im speaking as a recently separated Dad who hasn’t yet agreed (mutually btw) for the introduction of young children to new partner. First step is for me to meet him which I haven’t yet (nor have I had an invite to meet him … still waiting for that delight). Even if we’re able to be amicable, I think I’d be feeling the same as you.
But the other thought I’d be having is whether that level of intimacy is wise during current covid situ? Seems like unnecessary risk to me.
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