I’m just so lonely
25 December 2018 at 8:36 pm #18933
Sorrycant find how to delete the post so have edited it to this as I changed my mind about posting. Sorry to waste your time if you’ve read this x25 December 2018 at 9:27 pm #18935
Hope you’re ok xx28 January 2019 at 6:55 pm #20083
Hi NatJS, have only just seen the notification that you replied, I am sorry for taking so long to reply, and thank you xx28 January 2019 at 8:09 pm #20085
hi enna, where are you from?29 January 2019 at 9:21 am #20100
Hi Enna, where are you from. I know the feeling and sympathise. Looking to make new friends. Best wishes xx29 January 2019 at 8:30 pm #20242
Hi both, thanks for replying. I’m in Worcestershire. First time mom to a 10 month old, Christmas Day really brought it home to me that I’m doing this by myself. Evenings are worse. What’s odd is I was single a long time before I met my ex, and never felt lonely. How are you both?29 January 2019 at 11:41 pm #20245
i’m struggling too, I also spent Christmas alone with my 3 children – no family at all. I don’t feel lonely as in I want another partner, I have been single for 4 years and enjoy not being In a relationship now. I find the knowledge that lots of mothers around me that are bringing up their children with lots of support from their family makes me feel incredibly sad and yes I suppose lonely is the right word. Sports days , concerts , days out are all heart wrenching times but this is my life , i’m not happy with it at all, it is not the life I envisaged for myself as an adult when I was a child. I thought I would be married by now at 30 , have a great career , live on a farm and look glamourous all the time ,(bit of a contradiction!) I live because my children are here and they need me and that’s the only reason I live now! this is not depression, this is the result of a really bad upbringing, bad relationships and having to deal with it ! I distract myself with loads of things and to just distract yourself is the only advice I can give you! I am sure your situation is not as bad as mine though, although maybe the feelings you have are the same as mine .xx wish you the best xx30 January 2019 at 3:16 am #20250
I found that keeping busy with distractions eventually led to a small group of local friends. It was just their “shape” changed.
Before my son, there were a group of us who would meet for drinks after work or to do outdoorsy stuff at the weekend. Now it is a widowed neighbour, a local small holder whose husband has left, one or two people I run with or met at karate.
The xmas thing is difficult but half the population aren’t really having a loving joyous Christmas, they’re yelling at each other over the bread sauce or wanting to strangle the in-laws.
It will get better, honestly.30 January 2019 at 6:19 am #20251
Hi Enna, LJ and Kathy,
I’ve moved back to the UK after a relationship breakdown and I miss Italy terribly. I’ve just found it very hard to make new friends here and feel alone as a result. On the flipside settling into a career with lots of support has been great and eventually I did manage to move out of my mum’s and now have my own place through the council.
Woke up feeling low this morning, not depressed just sad and I can really relate to what LJ said about where she thought she would be at a certain point in her life. I can confirm that I never thought I would be so far away from building my life the way I imagined it. So much for my beautiful family home, holidays, etc. This makes me feel sad and I find myself constantly mulling things over from the past.
On the plus side (always have to remember to look for those!) my boys are amazing and I love them so much. It’s all about them at the moment and that’s fine. Just wish I had a few more friends for me and then I think I’d be ok. I thought I had met the man of my dreams who would look after me forever but life is full of nasty surpises and of course I have made my fair share of poor decisions!
Always hopeful that things will just turn around for us and that one day we will find our happy too. Lots of love xx30 January 2019 at 6:22 am #20252
P.S. Kathy so true about Christmas! Most families are dysfunctional anyway!! But sorry to hear Enna and LJ were on their own when they didn’t want to be. Big hugs30 January 2019 at 9:24 pm #20319
what kind words Ru72 , they are much appreciated and I always feel better when someone can relate to my situation as I don’t feel so alone in this world . Hope Enna feels better after reading these too!31 January 2019 at 1:26 pm #20352
Hi there sorry to hear you’re lonely – I’m also single with 3 kids ages 8, 2 years and 6 months.
I worry most about my 8 year old as he says he’s lonely and has no close friends at school. He recently said he wishes a little boy of similar age could come back for a play date and maybe a sleepover so we’re also looking for contacts and friends which seem to be mainly done on line these days! We live in the Warwickshire Worcestershire area.
Hope you find some contacts soon and don’t feel that you’re alone in this because you’re definitely not
All the best
Sarah31 January 2019 at 6:06 pm #20378
Hi Sarah, thanks so much for your lovely message. Hats off to you for managing 3 young kids on your own!
Pity we don’t live nearer as my 10 year old may have made a good play mate for your 8 year old. My youngest is very sociable and hasn’t had problems making friends but I worry about my eldest. I would like to see him have more friends out of school and go out more but not happening yet. He doesn’t seem too bothered by it so leaving things be.
So lovely to have messages of support from the group. It’s really helpful xx31 January 2019 at 6:28 pm #20379
Ru72. what a lovely post, it mirrored some of my own feelings and thoughts. Happy to chat anytime.