Single mother to a 1 year old. The dad was never involved in the beginning as he wasn’t sure if baby was his. Had a horrible experience with him as he was never there and builds my stress when pregnant. We were never married, or in a relationship. His name is also not on the birth cert. We had a legal DNA done and now he demands more rights. He gets to see my son once a week but now he insisted on having him overnight at his place! I strongly disapprove as he is too young to be away from his mother and this man I do not trust given the horrible experiences with him. What rights has he got anyway?
He doesn’t have rights, the child has rights to see his daddy.
At one year old, unless they have a very strong bond, it’s a bit early for overnights. It would be better to build their bond some more, maybe a whole day at the weekend, and introduce the idea of staying with daddy next summer.
But if you aren’t happy, if there is something specific you are concerned about, you could let him take you to court. Will he bother with the paperwork?
Thanks for the reply. No I had told him several times to take this to court to get some sort of legal binding done. I don’t think he has got the money for it. But its seems like a reasonable idea to let him have one day with him but not overnights.
I’m in a potentially similar position to you, as this could be me in about a year and a half (16weeks pregnant with 3rd child) so I armed myself with knowledge as I’ll not be naming the father on the birth certificate either, but I will be making the ‘father’ go to court if he wants access, and ensure contact through a contact centre, with supervision, and trust will have to be earnt for overnight stays.
Do not feel bullied into letting your child stay there overnight, and insist access is done correctly through court. He may not have money, but that isn’t your concern, your child’s safety is, so stand firm, and IF this becomes an issue with the ex then you are within your rights to stop contact and insist it is taken to court and the proper proceedings can take place.
I’m lucky – there is a warrant out for the arrest of the man who fathered my child for not attending court, so he is welcome to apply for the right to see his child but he will have to be arrested first and go to prison! Which he won’t do…. he’s not a suitable father figure on my opinion, and would need to change his life around for the privilege to become a parent.
Stand firm, you are your child’s advocate-there is some brilliant advice to be had here 😊