I met my husband when I was 18. He was 28. We got into a serious relationship quite quickly. I was pregnant and we had our first child when I was 19. I struggled with post natal depression. And never felt fully right.
We got married when I was 23. We then had our second child. Things still weren’t right between me and my husband. Our friendship faded and I felt like I was stuck in a loveless relationship. We kept working at it. Went through couples guidance. But things still weren’t back on track.
2 years later we had our 3rd child. I started to feel like I had no friends and that I was completely isolated, with no one to talk to.
My personality developed and changed. I made a few new freinds. And started feeling like myself again. Last year, I made a strong connection with a female friend of mine. It took me a while to realise what those feelings where. I expressed my feeling to her. She didn’t feel the same.
I knew that I had to tell my husband about my romantic feelings towards my friend. He understood. And we had lots of conversations about sexuality being fluidic. Which resulted in him decided that it would be best to end our marriage. We will still joint parent our children. And within a month of us separating, he moved out and has a new girlfriend. I still feel confused and misunderstood. After being in a relationship with the same person for 10 years, I’m not too sure how to carry on.
I know that it was me that changed the dimanic of our relationship because I fell in love with a woman. I’m torn between feeling like I shouldn’t have told my husband. But then I would have been lying to him. I wouldn’t have been able to carry on like that. And then the other part of me is upset and lost, because he has moved on so quickly.
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