I have had parental rights awarded by court 14yrs (2yrs) ago. Biological father was abusive, violent, an accused pedophile, and threatening. He has had nothing to do with our daughter, except for a brief visit when she was ten. All supervised by me. It didn’t end well.
my daughter is 16 and has reached out to him and met him without me knowing. He then took it upon himself to call my daughters school and was abusive and threatening to the receptionist. The school rang me and that’s how I found out she had been in touch. Apparently demanding to speak to someone about my daughter being bullied, this is not true.
my question is, is he allowed to see my daughter without asking me? They have had no contact and by the sounds of it is still a very dangerous man.
to make matters worse is my daughter is very vulnerable and is seeking help through CAMHS. He doesn’t know anything. What can I do to stop this happening again?
Hi there, it sounds like a nightmare situation and one I don’t envy at all. I’m sorry you and your daughter are going through this.
Disclaimer : I’m not a lawyer, but I’ve had experience of family law cases.
As your daughter is now 16, her decision to reach out to her biological father is largely her choice. Also if there is no existing court order stating no direct or indirect contact (and if she’s had supervised contact at age 10, this seems to be the case), then there is no legal reason why she can’t see her bio dad.
I would recommend legal advice if you want to prevent contact, but I’d suggest that you’ll struggle to obtain this if she’s clear she wants contact due to her age.
The alternative might be to get the school to refer to social services and have them involved so any contact is made safe and everything the bio dad does (and importantly, any deterioration in behaviour or mental health aka negative impact of contact) is formally recorded. You probably can’t enforce supervised contact as she’s 16, but if you take the approach of facilitating rather than obstructing, she’s more likely to be open and honest with you – which is what you need.
I’d also suggest having an actual conversation with your daughter – both parents – to try to understand why she wants contact and what she wants out of it.
Hope some of that was useful and you manage to find a way forward that keeps everyone safe.
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