I don’t know what to do

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  • #41592 Report

    Lost in life

    Hi all. I’m new in this forum and also in becoming a single parent soon. Ahh.Where to start…. 😑Me and my partner that I’m not married to broke up like thousands of times. But this time is for real. It was bound to happen to be honest, we just don’t get on, we can’t simply live together😒 We have been arguing constantly past year and half. I feel very drained. I don’t have energy for anything. It also doesn’t help I suffer from anxiety 🙁 Too many bad things happened between us that I resent him for and vice versa. We got one daughter together. I’m looking for advice what to do to be honest as I have never ever found myself in similar situation in a foreign world. I’m basically unemployed( only work small amount of hours as a domestic cleaner). Due to him working 12 hours shifts (days/nights). I just couldn’t find a decent job prior Coronavirus as I wasn’t flexible enough. Also somebody also had to look after our daughter and household. It doesn’t help we don’t have any family or many friends around too. Anyway. Now that we broke up he wants me to move out of his house and I have no idea what to do. I don’t have any income apart from the cleaning  money  which will be now reduced because he applied for different type of job at his current work and it has changed his work shifts to only day shifts from now on. Which means I loose all my clients because I won’t be able to come during the day to their houses =zero income😢 So in a nutshell, I’m on the verge of becoming homeless and a single mother🙁With no social support, no family, no perfect English and no job😒 Could anyone point me please to right direction in regards of what to do? Or who to call? I really need to move out as it’s mentally killing me, also it has a massive impact on our daughter to listen to us constantly arguing 😢😢Her confidence is low and my too😢

    #41619 Report


    Hi Lost

    I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s more than any parent should be burdened with.

    Start with the Citizens Advice Bureau in your area. They will be able to help you with things like benefits, child maintenance
    and legal advice if you need it. Also if you haven’t already, the Gingerbread helpline is really useful and can also help you understand a lot of the information out there.

    I hope you find this useful and things improve for you and your daughter soon.

    take care 🙂

    #41621 Report

    Confused parent

    Im a year on now and i am in a nice routine now at home, we have a court order that works well ordinerily. My ex is a night mare though still. Mainly over access and money. I had to go through csa but at least it was sorted quickly. He applies to court regularly to change things and is turned down. All i will say is set up a routine that works for you and your child, do something for your self after bed time every night and make plans for when your kids are with their father to occupy your mind. It is fine to wish they were with you and miss them too much it hurts but as long as its safe it is best for them. You will have good and Bad days but forgive yourself and eaxh day is a new day.

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