Husband walked out 6 weeks ago struggling to understand why

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  • #17726 Report

    kidsmyworld
    Participant

    I returned home from work 6 weeks ago to find my husband had taken all his things and left he , he did t even have the decency to tell me I got a text about half hour after I’d returned home to say he wasn’t coming back he wanted a different life !! He hardly sees his kids just a couple of hours a week iv told him they need to see him more and he said he’s busy having a life I know I can’t make him see the kids but I think it’s important that he is in there life’s regardless of what’s happening between us , I’m struggling to understand why he’s done all this he had been planning it a while he said over 6 months I asked him for a honest phone call yesterday and he said he was fed up with his life and wanted a different life to do hobbies and things he said he was fed up of me cooking crap meals and not keeping the house absolutely spotless ! I actually work full time so do what I can when I’m not working my house is clean but yeah toys are out etc but it’s not unclean at all far from it , surely this can’t be the only reason. I can’t get my head around it at all

    #17728 Report

    TrevCarp
    Participant

    I am not sure what to say, what a horrible place to be in, You may never get all the answers you want. Obviously he has some issues. the worse break ups is when its very much one sided.

    I would recommend you might want to seek counselling, you will go through a lot of emotions, and I am sure it will take time. You cant false him to see his kids, the most important thing to do, is be there for the kids, try not to **** him off, don’t lie to them, its ok not to always have all the answers.

    Sometimes not knowing everything can be actually less hurtful.

    My partner left me after 4 yrs, within a month was see someone else, I was broken, devastated, angry, hurt, as worse of all hatted she could leave my son so easy, after we had discussed what would ever happen she should keep seeing him, especially as he had gone through so much in the last 3 years. But the only time I could move on, was when I excepted I was never going to get all the answers.

    I hope this helps a little

     

    #17729 Report

    kidsmyworld
    Participant

    Thank you for your reply , the pain is horrendous isn’t it I’m hoping I will come through this stronger although part of me hopes he will come home

    #17737 Report

    kidsmyworld
    Participant

    Yes he pays maintenance for the kids I’m going to make an appointment with a councillor I asked if this was the only reason he left and he said it was one of the reasons , I honestly had no idea he was unhappy we were only laughing and joking with one another the night before he left when I reminded him of this he said yeah because your a good laugh and we get on really well and I hope we can remain best friends ! Which confused me even more , the weekend before he left we had been away for the weekend to see a couple of bands and had a great time he said he had a good time but felt like he was with someone like his sister ! I asked why he was still intimate with me and he refused to answer me

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