How to supervise contact

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  • #56267 Report

    Concerned101
    Participant

    Could I ask for some advice from anyone who has been through this?

    Myself and my wife separated eight months ago, initially with 50:50 shared care. Unfortunately she turned up to school while under the influence of alcohol and was arrested. Social services conducted a section 47 investigation, while the children resided with me. We attended court and visits were supervised by three mums while the instigation was completed.

    Despite my concerns regarding her alcohol dependence, they seemed that she could have unsupervised contact again and at court we agreed to return to 50:50 child’ care. She took an oath to the court not to drink alcohol while having the children.

    Less than three weeks later she was again arrested for drink driving at school.

    Again I have the children full time and I am returning to court.

    In the meantime, I want the children to see her, but have been advised that the contact should be supervised again. But because SS have stated that I am keeping the children safe, they are not involved at present.

    Relations between me and my wife are fat from good and she has stated that she wants to see the children and that it will be supervised, but not by who. The people who I knew, who were doing it previously are not involved.

    I want her to be able to see the children, but I want them to be safe and I feel that the responsible person should be someone who I can trust. Is this a reasonable request?

    Sorry for the long post, but a lot has happened in a short space of time.

    #56273 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    hi,

    is there a friend or someone neutral that could supervise her and child in local community, perhaps a library, park or coffee shop? other option is a contact centre which will likely cost money to use.

    #56276 Report

    Gumibear123
    Blocked

    Concerned101,

    Your request is more than reasonable.She’s proved repeatedly to be irresponsible and you just want them to be safe.

    #56284 Report

    Concerned101
    Participant

    Unfortunately the lies that she has been spinning have court up with her, and that may have put some local people off. During our marriage she isolated me from my friends and family so there isn’t any options there.

    She isn’t speaking to her own family and they are not local.

    She has made malicious accusations about me, so I’m not prepared to be with her without a chaperone.

    She has a new partner, but I know nothing about him or his family.  I have a feeling that she will want to use them, but I’m not reassured that they will be objective.

    Am I right to insist that the person supervising is somebody that I know and can trust?

    #56307 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    hi,

    I don’t think you would want a total stranger supervising your child. maybe you can let your ex know your concerns, and if there’s no solution to this, then can use a contact centre. there trained, regulated and its a safe environment.

    #56353 Report

    Hi Concerned101, I’m one of the moderators here. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this  – our  Single Parent Helpline may be able to advise on this.  They are on Freephone 0808 802 0925

    Opening hours:  Mon 10 – 6, Tues 10- 4, Wed 10 – 1 & 5 – 7, Thurs 10 – 4, Fri 10 – 4  They can be busy so callers can expect to wait up to 20 minutes before the call is answered

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)

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