How to let our daughter know we’re separating

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  • #62413 Report

    artisan84
    Participant

    Hello. I’m just after advice as to how to tell our daughter who’s nearly 6 that her mummy and daddy are separating and daddy is moving out (not far from where we live). Do we tell her now or wait until nearer the time when he does move out. Thanks in advance

    #62416 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    When is he moving out? Tell her sooner rather than later? Are we talking about a gap of months or weeks or years? Is the issue more about what she is told and how you phrase/word it?

    #62433 Report

    artisan84
    Participant

    Hi Andrew uk. Due to move out beginning of December and yes how to phrase it. I know kids are more resilient than we think but as it’s an amicable separation we don’t know what/how to say/phrase it

    #62437 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    There are lots of books for kids on the market. I didn’t tell my kids. The 3 of them just moved out in June 2020 with no warning and i still haven’t been able to talk to them.  I don’t have any answers.

    They need to know that we are no longer a married couple but we will always be a parental couple. We will never be separate because of you. We’ve had a think about our future and our future is always going to be around you.

    The above was from ‘Woman’s Hour’ 8th October 2021 and might be worth a listen.

    Emphasis the positives – 2 houses, 2 bedrooms etc.

    Live with us both but at different times.

    Have a look at the following:

    https://www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/help-separation-and-divorce/talking-about-separation/telling-children

     

    #62438 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant
    #62441 Report

    AnotherStatistic
    Participant

    Hi. I have just told my 5 and 7 year old daughters and it went surprisingly well. I agreed a script with my stbx beforehand and we managed to stick to it. We told them pretty early (our house is only just going on the market) but we thought that would be best as its obvious that something is wrong. Happy to provide more detailed info via direct message

    #62467 Report

    artisan84
    Participant

    Thanks Andrew uk for the links etc. Sorry you’ve not been able to speak to you children, I hope you get to soon. anotherstatistic like the idea of scripting what to say, she knows something is happening anyway so might be sooner we need to

Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)

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