How to feel good being a single parent

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 27 total)
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  • #40938 Report

    Bazzlem
    Participant

    I have felt rubbish ever since becoming a single parent.  I have this feeling of nerves times a million.  How do you feel good being a single parent?

    #40941 Report

    Jsmoove
    Participant

    It’s a bad feeling which will fade in time bazz,as long as my kids are happy I’m happy,u need to forget about the past and plan for the future,U need to focus on yourself and your child,wat I done was I started to exercise and lift weights things that use to make me happy before I was married,as I lost my identity while I was married,I started reading self help books to get rid of the anxiety I was dealing with after the split,u need to find happiness in yourself first,before you pursue another relationship,I think you should try counselling mate sometimes it’s good to talk to a professional mate and don’t be ashamed to,it gave me the confidence to move forward and focus on my kids and myself

    #40946 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Hi its hugely tough and scary at times but everytime you should always praise yourself for what you do. I used to be very critical, i am still in parts but i think not sure a lot of people could manage as well as me. I have my off days and struggles but its human nature, stress, tiredness and this lockdown also doesnt help

    We are all pretty similar in terms of we all have our days where we feel a bit down and are we doing a good job. We should all take time to reflect on good

    Ive just got out of a rly bad situation taking a while for feelings to shift and will continue but ive made a change for a hopefully happier future and meet someone right for me

    Here to chat anytime

    #40955 Report

    Hope76
    Participant

    Hi all, I have been a single parent for a while now & I remember feeling guilt, worry, stress, anxiety – sometimes even after 5yrs of going it alone I still feel that!
    but it certainly does get better – your child just needs you to love them, be positive, stay strong for them….you will get through it.
    you certainly do need to leave the past where it is, concentrate on you & your little one….don’t put a time limit on ‘finding yourself’ again. Don’t worry about what people think of you – being a single parent is a really tough job & until you are in the situation no one really understands, if you feel you need counselling – go get it, there is absolutely no shame in it. It is far worse to try cope with all those feelings alone!

    Please don’t ever worry about other people’s judgement of you either…they are insignificant sin your life. As long as your little one loves you….that’s all you need

    take care now & stay strong

     

    #40959 Report

    Will
    Participant

    Hello fellow single parents,

    I separated from my wife only a few days ago.  There are so many raw emotions it’s very hard to focus on anything right now.  Both of us have remained outwardly calm and controlled in front of our children but both kids (9 and 12) recognise the tension and unhappiness.  I constantly have to hold my tongue so as not to tell them too much and upset them.  We have yet to work out a schedule for when the children will be with each of us.  My work schedule pre covid was irregular with travel.  I am concerned once the travel starts up again I will be reliant on my ex to cover me.  It’s so odd.  I do not want to rely on her after she broke my trust but I’m going to have to find a way.  Sat here in bed pondering of better things…  Firstly I will be the best dad I can for my wonderful children.  I must also invest in me to build myself back up from this.  I will start new activities, meet new people, broaden my horizons, indulge in the hobbies I really love.

    #42158 Report

    Bazzlem
    Participant

    Does anyone know how to feel good being a single parent.  I can’t seem to feel good being a single dad.  My main concern is that I’m going to be lonely for the rest of my life.  Who wants to take on someone else’s child.

    #42159 Report

    Lorraine123
    Participant

    Hi. There’s plenty of people who would have a relationship with someone who has a child. It’s hard being single with a child, it’s hard to meet people but not impossible. I have three children, they’re all happy. Our household is happier now than it was when their dad was living here. I concentrate on being the best parent I can, I can’t do any more than that.

    #42160 Report

    Jsmoove
    Participant

    Bazz there is heaps of people in relationships with kids from other relationships as the divorce rate is close to 50%,if u can’t be happy being a single parent,you are not ready for a new relationship,you must put your child first,you don’t have to be in a relationship to be happy and your child needs you now more than ever,wen the time is right she will come along

    #42162 Report

    yeahitsmilo
    Participant

    Hi Bazzlem. I’m a single dad too and sometimes I feel the same as you if I’m having a bad day. I think it’s natural to sometimes think that way if you’re feeling low on confidence. I don’t think the whole pandemic and the lockdown has helped anyone on that front. It’s very easy to feel lonely when you’re trapped indoors all day trying to entertain young children all the time. It’s not that I don’t love spending time with my two girls of course, it’s just hard not having any grown-up conversations for weeks on end.

    Honestly, right now I feel that I’m more focused on the girls than anything else and thinking about relationship kind of comes second to that. I do try to find time to enjoy myself and try to keep my interests up but trying to think about new relationships is just something I’ve not been ready for or had time yet. I know it’s hard and I totally have days where I feel like you do despite what I’ve just said. Hang in there (although I know that easier said than done!).

    • This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by yeahitsmilo.
    #42502 Report

    Bazzlem
    Participant

    8 months on from my split and I’m still feeling terrible.  Can someone tell me how to feel good being a single parent because I can’t seem to feel it.

    #42551 Report

    Bazzlem
    Participant

    I feel rubbish being a single dad.  I don’t think I can be happy being a single dad.  I feel terrible.  Can anyone help me feel better? I think my main fear is not meeting anyone else because I have a child.

    #42555 Report

    Noon
    Participant

    Hello There,

    Focus your attention on how to feel good. Just for yourself. Do not worry too much. What will happen will happen, even with all this worry. Learn how to enjoy your own company and this is the time for it. You may find someone who doesn’t mind your situation as a single parent. Or may be not. Either way you will stay happy, strong and self sufficient. Your happiness could be a load other things than being with someone else. Believe in this , so you won’t miss the good things happening in your life because you thought you have not met the right person yet.

    #42560 Report

    Effusive
    Participant

    Touché to the above comment.

    Your main priority would be to learn to love yourself first, before worrying about loving somebody else.

    I’m a month down the line now and finding someone else has never, ever been further from my mind. Maybe try concentrating on finding something you love at this moment in time, rather than someone you love. 8 months is no time at all to grieve.

    And if it’s any consolation, what you, myself and everyone else on this forum are going through, we’re not the first and we most certainly won’t be the last. That’s why we are all here. There are probably billions of single parents the world over who have found love again. What will be will be.

    Stay strong, geezer.

     

    #42619 Report

    Bazzlem
    Participant

    Nah I’m struggling to cope being a single parent.  I miss the family life.  I can’t be happy being a single parent because I feel like I won’t meet anyone else again because I have a son.

    #42625 Report

    MammaBearTo2
    Participant

    My only advice is concentrate on being the best dad you can be to your son and take care of yourself. You’ll meet someone when the time is right … I wouldn’t rush it … there’s more important things in life 😀

    P.S if anyone doesn’t want to be with you because you have a son then they’re not worth wasting time on! 😁

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 27 total)

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