How do you adjust to being single?
21 April 2019 at 10:02 am #23950
Thank you girlfriday, I don’t think there’s any one else, he’s just going to work and then sleep when he hasn’t the boys, I’ve noticed he’s not doing much with them lately but I know he’s short of money 🤷🏻♀️ It’s like he’s giving up, but I’ve asked him and he says he’s sort of happy now,I know I need to sort myself out but it’s only six weeks since he left, xx21 April 2019 at 10:15 am #23951
It drives you crazy the not knowing but even when you get the answers they don’t make sense.
I have to stop myself texting as your just so used to doing it or ringing to tell them random stuff.
x21 April 2019 at 11:02 am #23955
Sylvia38, I know what you mean it used to be when I heard songs on the radio that reminded me of various events which made me cry!..thankfully that’s passed now but I still feel a pain when I hear them.
Jean, you don’t have to ‘sort yourself out’ it’s not that easy. For me it felt like a bereavement, having someone to share things with whether it be text or talk & then all of a sudden to have it taken away so suddenly.. Maybe given time & space he will realise what he is missing, have u suggested counselling?
x21 April 2019 at 12:20 pm #23958
Yes, But he said if he feels like this now it’s not going to change, I have to give him time and try and step away for a while, I pray every night that I’m what he’s missing 🥺21 April 2019 at 12:31 pm #23959
Yes I can understand that.. in the meantime try & find something to keep u occupied when the kids are in bed, a box set, a book, painting your nails or a nice bath, something you can control & try and take pleasure from the small things.. I still haven’t made it to one of the Meet Up events (not quite there in my head yet) but I know some people on here have.. Just a little something to focus on in the short term x21 April 2019 at 12:33 pm #23960
My situation is quite different, my ( ex) continues to live in the house, but she is doing her life… and that is what hurts the most, she ignores me completely, and whilst in the house, the only important thing is her phone, and ignoring the kids. In a few minutes, she’s going out with her friends. The situation is toxic, but I can’t move from this house because it has been adapted for my disabled son and like I said, before I’m the main carer and she have said she is in full time work and can’t drive, so is unable to care for him herself.
Like other people have commented on here, a lot of thinks makes you remember; a song, a place…or to know this is the last Easter… It does hurt, especially when you didn’t have make the call and call it quits… I’m actually I’m with a counsellor, which consists of me talking and letting out the pain. Recently, I’ve started to go out, getting a coffee, walking ( when I know my son is safe and not alone in the house [ my daughter who is 17, but is not her duty to look after him] ). This usually helps me take my mind off of her, and distract myself…but the worst comes at night…19 years are not easy to forget…21 April 2019 at 12:34 pm #23961
That’s what I’m like I remember a time or a song and I feel a stabbing pain.
Then I think the person now isn’t the person then if that makes sense.
He just decided he didn’t want to be married to me anymore and as hard as it is he said he’s minds made up and it’s not changing.
And to be honest I don’t think I would want him back not if someone who is supposed to love you can make you feel like this!
I have Days where I worry and panic about everything and Days where I am happy so I’m just rolling with it x21 April 2019 at 12:47 pm #23962
Hello Silvia 38, happy Easter !
Yes I understand, I have the same feelings, I don’t want her back ( she doesn’t also, she is happy in the way she is ) but the trust from my side has gone, and to be honest, why the hell I want to loose my time and energy in a person who don’t give a damn about me… life can be hard some times…but it’s what we do about it, and that is the point.21 April 2019 at 12:50 pm #23963
Sergio that sounds an awful situation to be in, though it’s good you are able to get out even if it’s just for short periods of time.
Sylvia38 yes that makes perfect sense, what has happened since we separated makes me realise he is no longer the man I met & married all that time ago.. he had so much anger directed at me for his guilt I think.. And yes someone recently told me to roll with things & stop over thinking so I am trying! 🙂21 April 2019 at 1:06 pm #23964
Hello GirlFriday, Happy Easter for you and your loved ones ! We’re all in the same boat…I hope it takes each one of us to a better place !21 April 2019 at 1:31 pm #23965
Back at ya Sergio01!! What a lovely thought ⛵️21 April 2019 at 4:16 pm #23967
GirlFriday what Meetup events?21 April 2019 at 5:50 pm #23968
Hi Alan1, there is an app called meet up, you put your location in & interests & it brings up different activities in your area, from coffee groups to rambling to photography etc.. I have just not plucked up the courage to actually take part in any of the activities near me yet!21 April 2019 at 6:13 pm #23969
Happy Easter 🐣 Everyone
We are all in the same boat it’s horrible unfair and I’m sure none of us pictured it happening
Its like everything around yous changed and your stuck.
I’m trying to see one positive thing a Day.21 April 2019 at 6:20 pm #23970
I’ve been doing the walking ones then after we have finished we go to a pub for drinks and something to eat. Did 2 rambling ones last year along the Thames . Loved getting out and chatting to new people