How do you adjust to being single?

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Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 46 total)
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  • #23950 Report

    jean Jeanie
    Participant

    Thank you girlfriday, I don’t think there’s any one else, he’s just going to work and then sleep when he hasn’t the boys, I’ve noticed he’s not doing much with them lately but I know he’s short of money 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s like he’s giving up, but I’ve asked him and he says he’s sort of happy now,I know I need to sort myself out but it’s only six weeks since he left, xx

    #23951 Report

    Sylvia38
    Participant

    It drives you crazy the not knowing but even when you get the answers they don’t make sense.

    I have to stop myself texting as your just so used to doing it or ringing to tell them random stuff.

    x

    #23955 Report

    GirlFriday
    Participant

    Sylvia38, I know what you mean it used to be when I heard songs on the radio that reminded me of various events which made me cry!..thankfully that’s passed now but I still feel a pain when I hear them.

    Jean, you don’t have to  ‘sort yourself out’ it’s not that easy. For me it felt like a bereavement, having someone to share things with whether it be text or talk & then all of a sudden to have it taken away so suddenly.. Maybe given time & space he will realise what he is missing, have u suggested counselling?

    x

    #23958 Report

    jean Jeanie
    Participant

    Yes, But he said if he feels like this now it’s not going to change, I have to give him time and try and step away for a while, I pray every night that I’m what he’s missing 🥺

    #23959 Report

    GirlFriday
    Participant

    Yes I can understand that.. in the meantime try & find something to keep u occupied when the kids are in bed, a box set, a book, painting your nails or a nice bath, something you can control & try and take pleasure from the small things.. I still haven’t made it to one of the Meet Up events (not quite there in my head yet) but I know some people on here have.. Just a little something to focus on in the short term x

    #23960 Report

    Sergio01
    Participant

    My situation is quite different, my ( ex) continues to live in the house, but she is doing her life… and that is what hurts the most, she ignores me completely, and whilst in the house, the only important thing is  her phone, and ignoring the kids. In a few minutes, she’s going out with her friends. The situation is toxic, but I can’t move from this house because it has been adapted for my disabled son and like I said, before I’m the main carer and she have said she is in full time work and can’t drive, so is unable to care for him herself.

    Like other people have commented on here, a lot of thinks makes you remember; a song, a place…or to know this is the last Easter… It does hurt, especially when you didn’t have make the call and call it quits… I’m actually I’m with a counsellor, which consists of me talking and letting out the pain. Recently, I’ve started to go out, getting a coffee, walking ( when I know my son is safe and not alone in the house [ my daughter who is 17, but is not her duty to look after him] ). This usually helps me take my mind off of her, and distract myself…but the worst comes at night…19 years are not easy to forget…

    #23961 Report

    Sylvia38
    Participant

    That’s what I’m like I remember a time or a song and I feel a stabbing pain.

    Then I think the person now isn’t the person then if that makes sense.

    He just decided he didn’t want to be married to me anymore and as hard as it is he said he’s minds made up and it’s not changing.

    And to be honest I don’t think I would want him back not if someone who is supposed to love you can make you feel like this!

    I have Days where I worry and panic about everything and Days where I am happy so I’m just rolling with it x

    #23962 Report

    Sergio01
    Participant

    Hello Silvia 38, happy Easter !

    Yes I understand, I have the same feelings, I don’t want her back ( she doesn’t also, she is happy in the way she is ) but the trust from my side has gone, and to be honest, why the hell I want to  loose my time and energy in a person who don’t give a damn about me… life can be hard some times…but it’s what we do about it, and that is the point.

    #23963 Report

    GirlFriday
    Participant

    Sergio that sounds an awful situation to be in, though it’s good you are able to get out even if it’s just for short periods of time.

    Sylvia38 yes that makes perfect sense, what has happened since we separated makes me realise he is no longer the man I met & married all that time ago.. he had so much anger directed at me for his guilt I think.. And yes someone recently told me to roll with things & stop over thinking so I am trying! 🙂

    #23964 Report

    Sergio01
    Participant

    Hello GirlFriday, Happy Easter for you and your loved ones ! We’re all in the same boat…I hope it takes each one of us to a better place !

    #23965 Report

    GirlFriday
    Participant

    Back at ya Sergio01!! What a lovely thought ⛵️

    #23967 Report

    Alan1
    Participant

    GirlFriday what Meetup events?

    #23968 Report

    GirlFriday
    Participant

    Hi Alan1, there is an app called meet up, you put your location in & interests & it brings up different activities in your area, from coffee groups to rambling to photography etc.. I have just not plucked up the courage to actually take part in any of the activities near me yet!

    #23969 Report

    Sylvia38
    Participant

    Happy Easter 🐣 Everyone

    We are all in the same boat it’s horrible unfair and I’m sure none of us pictured it happening

    Its like everything around yous changed and your stuck.

    I’m trying to see one positive thing a Day.

    #23970 Report

    Sherinam
    Participant

    I’ve been doing the walking ones then after we  have finished we go to a pub for drinks and something to eat.  Did 2 rambling ones last year along the Thames . Loved getting out and chatting to new people

Viewing 15 posts - 31 through 45 (of 46 total)

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