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  • #51158 Report

    Helena788
    Participant

    Hello all,

    This is my first post here since joining. I am a single mum, my daughter is 7 (almost 8) and I’ve been a single parent since she was born. She’s never met her father.

    I just wanted to reach out really as I feel like people can’t really comphrend how challenging, lonely and isolating (especially this past 12 months) it is unless they’ve had the same experience. I think just not having someone to share it all with, to make decisions with or discuss things with can be really hard and extremely lonely.

    I work part time and am currently on furlough (3rd time) and I am concerned about childcare issues when I am due to return (I work evenings and weekends). My mum used to help me but she works full time and looks after my dad who is really unwell now, so it’s a lot for her. I am concerned I may have to leave and apply for Universal Credit which I am anxious about. I am going to submit a flexible working request but given the needs of the business, it’s unlikely for anything to be able to change really. Has anyone else ever had a similar experience?

    I would really like to connect and chat with others like myself.

    For all of those who may be or have ever struggled, I feel you and I see you.

    Thanks,

    Helena x

    • This topic was modified 1 month, 1 week ago by Helena788.
    #51173 Report

    Metalmonk70
    Participant

    Well, if it makes you feel better about humanity, I embraced becoming a father…not all men run away (though alot do)…my daughter is my life, I love hearing her singing in the other room as she does her school homework, and when she texts me from the other room to ask for a bagel with strawberry cream cheese…it cracks me up…I let go of my ego years ago, in order to focus on being a parent…sometimes, we end up where we are supposed to be in life…

    #51174 Report

    Metalmonk70
    Participant

    Yes, being a single parent is difficult…but so, so worth everything!

    #51186 Report

    Helena788
    Participant

    Ah that’s so sweet. I call my daughter Dolly (it’s a nickname) and she calls me big Dolly – so big Dolly and little Dolly!

    I feel you. I think I’m the same. She is my main focus right now.

    How old is your daughter?

    Thanks for getting in touch.

    #51193 Report

    Metalmonk70
    Participant

    My daughter just turned 12, and she’s a good girl…but she stays up way too late, sometimes when I say goodnight at 9pm & then wake up at 5am – she’s still awake! It’s amazing watching them grow up, their personalities develop…..I was laughing so much the other night, that she walked over to see what was going on (I was watching old episodes of Monty Python)….she didn’t didn’t get it, but she did sit and watch for a few min, then said, “ok dad, I’m going back to my room, goodnight”….I work 70 hours a week, but still get to spend 4 evenings with my daughter a week….speaking of work, gotta go….have a great day

    #51208 Report

    mstime
    Participant

    Hi Helena,

    Your so right. Being a single parent can be both hard and isolating. It helps to have family support around you (i dont). Sometimes i feel down and then sometimes im on a high due to me managing to cope with a 14, 8 and 5 year old on my own. As a bloke it doesnt come naturally either but hey we  do what we have to do. There are times when ive laughed,times when ive cried , times when ive just thanked the Lord that i have the strength to keep going and keep working and remember why i do this. Its adult conversation thats missed the most though. Just the chance for a laugh and joke and stuff. My mate comes around about every 2 weeks and ive found that when we start chatting about football,music etc i just cant shut up !  It makes such a change to Cbeebies, Fortnite,Roblox, making dinners,snacks,washing school stuff, checking PE kit etc. I wouldnt have it any other way though.

    Take care

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