Help and Advice

[YoungDadParticipant]

Hi

My partner has recently moved out of our home leaving me to care for our 16 month old son. The agreement was that I would look after our son until she found a job and proper accommodation, not a house share with 5 other people. I agreed hoping that it would help our relationship and also she can come and see our son as much as she wants. Looking after my son is not a problem as I have plenty of family and friends to help and I can continue working to support us. He is well loved and a happy chappy.

Now the bombshell, I have now learned that her exboyfreind moved in with her straight away and that she had been seeing him before she left us. This is the same boyfriend who physically abused her in there previous relationship. I am worried sick about the safety of my son when he is with her. Although I have no proof of abuse, only her word that it happened and as you can see she does not have a good track record. She has threatened to take my son to live with her now due to the breakdown in our relationship.

I am seeking legal advice tomorrow to see what rights I have and also try and secure living arrangements so that I know my son will be safe and secure. I know I am jumping the gun but I am just worried sick and would never forgive myself if anything happened to my son. She is a good mother just has problems mentally and  has been badly led on by so called friends.

Any advice or help will be gratefully received , sorry it was so long winded.

Thanks

[BluebirdSueParticipant]

From what I can read you are doing everything that you should be doing. Please seek legal advice, it doesn’t sound like your ex wants to arrange things over a coffee.

As for the ex boyfriend, as weird as it sounds for some reason some people just can’t stay away from these toxic people. I know a dozen people who have done or are doing the same thing. I’ve also held onto relationships for longer than they should.

But the most important thing is that you have a lovely healthy child and tons of support so carry on with the good work. And try not to worry too much 😀

[YoungDadParticipant]

Thank you for your support

 

[IandParticipant]

I am not an expert, but it sounds like you are doing everything right. Please feel free to pm if you have any other questions. I am a single dad who had a similarish experience and everything has worked out for the best.

[YoungDadParticipant]

what was your outcome if you dont mind me asking.

 

[BluebirdSueParticipant]

Its a long story so bear with me

When I decided to end the relationship 12 years ago my son was only a baby at the time. So at first I used to bring him to stay for weekends and I would to but that changed when he married.

Its gone from him taking him on weekends to him visiting for a few hours a week and now its a few hours every few weeks. Not my choice. We barely speak and I’ve banned him from coming in the house. The last few years are so much better now

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