Hello! New to Gingerbread

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  • #15064 Report

    Hello one and all, I’ve only just heard about Gingerbread after being a single parent for a year and thought I would give it a go.

    I’m mum to a beautiful girl, 2, who lives with me and spends every other weekend with her dad. I work full time, but am very lucky to have lots of flexibility which means I can work from home most of the time.

    Not lots in the way of family locally, but a wonderful set of friends who have been incredibly supportive over the past 12 months since my ex-husband left. However, what I find sometimes is that I’d like to be able to talk to people who have been through a similar experience. If only to have a laugh about the sheer circus that life has become!! Potty training a toddler, holding down a job and re-entering the dating scene anyone??!!

    So with that in mind, I would love to hear any funny stories you might have about those moments you have had as a single parent when you just have to laugh or you’ll cry 🙂

    #15090 Report

    KMMPD
    Participant

    Hi,

    I’m also new to Gingerbread and to being a single mum to my beautiful two year old boy.

    My husband moved out a few months ago and am also going through the trials and tribulations of working full time, as well as being a full time mum.

    We have not yet formalised a care plan and so would love to suggestions as to how to decide what is fair as part of me has become very protective over my boy and am reluctant to let my ex have him. I know this is not ideal but being in an empty house that we all used to live in together is painful.

    #15142 Report

    tteok-bokki
    Participant

    hey, i’m new to here as well. have a boy of 1.5 years old. So far, everything is ok, just the childcare kills, as i work part time. Still i love my job and want to stay there. sometime you just want time for yourself, so i am resting a bit at work.  The biggest problem was to find another mom to share the childcare, if they would also like to work part time. Found one lovely mom, but in the end i was left without a childcare a day before i need to be at work.  In the end i took my son to a childminder, but the cost is quite high =(

    on the good side, i enjoy going out with my son. he is super active and very social. so its nice to go to a coffee shop. i take a cup of late and he has his babychino.

    #15247 Report

    Thanks for the replies 🙂

    @KMMPD I really empathise. The ’empty house’ feeling is very hard to deal with and I can remember feeling isolated and lonely. My daughter spends every other weekend with her dad. It sounds a bit odd, but I didn’t know what to do on Sundays. We would have had a family outing somewhere, maybe a roast dinner, movie in the afternoon etc. It was the worst time of my week. Initially, I had to force myself to get out and do things, but after a while I found I really looked forward to that ‘me time’ and thought that there are loads of parents out there who would give their front teeth for a little break! Full time working whilst raising a toddler is really full on, so I use those weekends to do stuff which makes me happy. I go for long walks in the fresh air with my earphones in listening to music (happy songs only!), go shopping, see friends for coffee and the occasional nice lunch. Eventually I started wanting to go out socialising in the evenings and then felt like I wanted to start dating again. It was a gradual journey and now my life is full up with lovely things to look forward to. I then really value that time I have with my daughter, but at the same time, I look on my child-free weekends as valuable and deserved respite from the pressure of the last fortnight.

    @tteok yeah the cost of childcare is ridiculous. My daughter will be eligible for the 30 free hours next January and I can’t wait! It’s not the whole bill, but a big portion of it and it will all help. Also I’m potty training at the moment, so think of all the money that won’t be spent on nappies! I know it is stating the blindingly obvious, but make sure you’re getting anything you might be entitled to – child tax credits, child benefit and so on. My daughter’s nursery are super helpful with advice about stuff like this, but I know not everyone is that lucky.

    #15262 Report

    1504Silvia
    Participant

    Hi all, I’m having lot of support from the government, you have just to ask to jobcentre plus and somebody will help you even with childcare cost. If you like just send me a private message and I will share my experience. I have to grow up a little boy of 3 months by myself and thanks to the government the only thing I am not worried about are the money.

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