Hi, I feel bad speaking about this topic as many people want to spend as much time as they can possible with their children.
I seperated with my ex back in March 2019, since then a verbal agreement was made between ourselves which suited until I met my partner and started a new job.
I work 8-4pm weekdays and one weekend out of the month whilst also studying an evening course.
My Partener is supportive of the fact I have a child with someone else but with her living miles away and having my daughter every weekend it is impossible to spend quality time together unless we both book time off work.
I have tried to approach my ex in regards to changing our arrangements but she continues to be as difficult as she was throughout our relationship, I started meditation proceeding to which she didnt want to attend.
I would like to sort this outside of court. As financially I cant afford court proceedings but dont want to end up access
Hey, I hear you. I’m in a similar situation, and some weekends I resent having my boy-although I never take it out on him. I wouldn’t feel guilty for wanting a little weekend time to yourself out of a hard working week.
I tried mediation too, and it was nice to be heard, but without the partner also attending, it goes nowhere.
Mediation is quite hard to do if one person is in a new relationship and kids are involved,I had a nightmare of a time as at first I had my kids every weekend and 3 nights a week,but mediation also helped me stand up for myself and tell my ex that our children come first before her new relationship and to make time for her kids,so after an hour into our 3rd mediation session we came up with an agreement that I will have the kids every 2nd weekend and 3 nights a week
Ive read with interest the posts about struggling to have your son at the weekends, I dont think its easy on either parents once you live in different homes and try and get on with your lives. Ive been a single mum for almost 14 years now, my ex would see our two girls just on a sunday every week – his choice, and if I was lucky would take them away for a week of two during the summer holidays. Now my girls are teenagers, the youngest doesnt wany yo see him at all, and the older one – every time she does see him tends to come back in tears because of something hes said. I have said to y girls that it is up to them if they want to see him or not, I wont stand in between them unless they want me to intervene.
One of the things that is most noticiable when there is little contact during the week and just the one day a week or less in some cases (as my ex will chenge the dates and times now and again to suit himself) is that he doesnt know my girls very well any more, and he treats them as if they were little still. I know its hard hun, but if you were able to spend quality time with your son at the weekend, without feeling completely shattered by it all, everything would be much better for all involved. Of course, this is just my opinion, and you are welcome to comment in any way 🙂
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