Going it alone
8 July 2019 at 8:37 am #27430
hi, I’m new here, I’m 42 and about to start the ivf process alone!
sone might call me mad, but I need to fill this huge gap in my heart.
I have not been lucky enough to find the right person to do this with so why not!
Is there anyone else here in a similar position?
id be interested to chat8 July 2019 at 12:55 pm #27445
I didn’t go through IVF but I knew pretty early on that I’d be raising my child alone.
If this is what you need to do, go for it. Good luck2 August 2019 at 9:52 pm #28673
im 39 and was lucky enough to be successful on my first attempt . I’m now 12 weeks . I was dumped by my partner after pregnancy was confirmed . I’ve also been made redundant . So now single and unemployed . Heartbroken and over the moon at the same time . His loss he loses out not me. And so glad I have a child now. Men come and go. It will be hard but worth it x4 August 2019 at 8:56 pm #28739
I am a pregnant at 39 and 32 weeks pregnant through IVF and sperm dononation. I am really happy as I was told I didn’t have much chance of conceiving due to low AMH levels. Although, it can be abit daunting at times like everyone else who is pregnant. My family are supportive of my decision. I have not met anyone suitable to have a child with. I was in relationship a couple of years ago. But, it was abusive. I live in the West Midlands. I became pregnant by IVF first time at Birmingham Women’s Hospital. Hope everything work out well.21 August 2019 at 5:18 pm #29414
Best. Decision. Ever.
If you want a kid and you haven’t met anyone, then you’re doing exactly what you have to do.
I didn’t go through IVF, I went IUI as I was lucky enough to catch it early to do it more ‘natural’.
People don’t realise that fertility runs out for women, and it happens rather fast. But if you want to be a mum and your kid so badly, then that baby will be the luckiest in the whole world. You’re not mad and your child will be loved so much he won’t even mind not having a dad. I’ve always thought I’d rather my kid has no dad than a crap one. You won’t have to fight over names, school, values and how to raise your child, you will have total freedom. No fighting over where to spend the holiday, your choice!
so yes, at times, it can be lonely, but I’d rather be lonely than being miserable in a crap relationship. Besides, when you have a kid, trust me, you are never lonely. This little person is gonna hog all your free time! for the best but sometimes with tantrums haha.
And if you meet that someone special later in life, you’ll have no baggage, no crazy ex to hide in the closet.
Just get organised with your finances, your support system, what you can and can’t do, get all your ducks in a row and you’ll smash it!
Congratulation and best of luck.
Lx23 August 2019 at 3:27 pm #29462
I’m here too 🙂
30 weeks. 39 years old. IVF and sperm donation.
Absolutely thrilled. I had a string of long relationships with men who didn’t want children, were in messy situations or who turned out to be alcoholics/abusive and so the years passed and I found myself single again. Time was almost up so I took the decision
If you want to chat drop me a DM.
Wishing you the best of luck!4 November 2019 at 8:35 pm #32496
I’m also going it alone by choice through IUI & donor sperm. I knew I wanted a family and would regret it if I waited too long, holding out for the right guy for me.
My little girl is now 10 weeks old and I am smitten and know it was the right thing to do.
Good luck and very happy to chat anytime x4 November 2019 at 9:53 pm #32500
Theres no reason not to. And besides, you’ll never be alone again when you have a little one. I feel that I’ve raised my kids alone and I’ve done just fine. Sometimes its better to have one amazing parent then two awful ones.
Good luck with the IVF process4 November 2019 at 11:01 pm #32506
I LOVE this post it’s made me happy!
Iv two children already. I’d really love another ☺ I never thought of this as an option.
As long as you are happy your child will be no matter what! It’s easy street live within your means, don’t worry kids spell love TIME everything will fall into place Xx5 November 2019 at 12:22 am #32516
Good luck to all you wonderful ladies going through Ivf 🤗 and it certainly is better to be the 1 amazing parent, than 2 parents who don’t get along xxx6 November 2019 at 10:42 pm #32635
Caroline04 please update us on how everything goes 🙂
Best wishes20 January 2020 at 9:21 pm #35966
I’m just about to start the process – going to an info evening this week. Would love to get peoples experiences of how they went about it – I’m hoping to iui but my mum had fertility issues so may need to ivf.
Have loads of questions about sperm donors and the process – and all the info is about couples!
If anyone is keen to share their experience I’d love to chat!
🙂20 January 2020 at 10:51 pm #35969
I dont think its crazy at all to plan a child on your own. I was in what I thought was a lifelong, happy marriage and the baby was completely planned and wanted by both of us. He walked out and left when I was 22 weeks pregnant leaving me heartbroken. So I’ll be raising a baby more than likely totally alone.
I guess what I’m saying is, you can have all the plans and ideas of doing things the ‘right’ way, but it still goes tits up! So don’t worry about it and just do what is right for you. As long as your baby is loved and wanted by you that’s all that matters. Good luck to all you mummies out there!24 January 2020 at 8:15 am #36050
I’m going it alone. I have done my blood tests and ultrasound test (pre-pregnancy checks). My doctor says I have to get more healthy with my eating and exercise for the AI. By Spring 2020 I should be doing artificial insemination (AI) with donor sperm.
Can I just say, I’m so happy to see many of us go it alone, it’s empowering to do this. Most of my family are happy I’m doing this, it’s just one negative person in my family (my brother) who keeps treating me horribly about my solo journey. I try to ignore him, even though I get panic attacks over siblings like this.6 October 2021 at 1:20 pm #60757
Hi, I am very new to all of this. In November 2019 I married the man I loved and for 7 years we have talked about having a baby together. We were supposed to try last year but the pandemic and a redundancy put the plans on hold.
Everything changed for us – we started a business and looking back as people we changed. Recently he told me he doesn’t want a baby (naturally), combine this with a lot of other issues we have been going through and now I am facing the future alone.
My marriage has been on the rocks for a while so I have been doing some research about having a baby alone. I have always been determined that I wouldn’t miss out on having children because of a man.
I have a good support network around me, they don’t know what is happening yet but they will soon.
I know I need to come to terms with my marriage ending and the issues around that before I go down the route of having a baby.
Has anyone else been in this situation? I have known for a while that my marriage was on the rocks so this isn’t a complete surprise. I just feel that my marriage ended with a pop rather than a bang.