Fixed contact days

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  • #15136 Report


    I am currently divorcing my husband.  We have 2 kids. My daughter is nearly 18 and for various reasons chooses not to have contact with him. As she is nearly an adult I respect this decision.

    My son is 15 and my ex tends to dictate to

    me what days he will see him. He gives very little notice of any changes and I m

    finding it disruptive. He does no actual parenting. It’s just trips and meals

    out. He does have his own place so could

    take him there. My son has GCSEs next year and a lot of homework and coursework to complete

    It would make life easier if ex stuck to set days for contact and o have suggested that   . I have asked him what days would be best .  He is terrible for planning in advance and communication to my son and to me , I just thought it would make life easier all round   He can be controlling and I think not letting anyone know what his plans are for contact is a way of controlling us still

    Am I being reasonable in requesting this?



    #15214 Report



    this seems to be very much on your ex’s terms and he is telling you what is suitable for him. Surely at 15 your son should have quite a bit of input on when and how often he sees his father? I think it’s totally reasonable to decide with your son which day/ days of the week would be most suitable to see his dad around other commitments / school work  etc and tell your ex that this is what’s on offer.

    #15215 Report


    Thank you.  I have spoken to my son and he has a good idea of what he wants. I have told ex to speak to him and put together an agreement. He is very controlling and struggles to see how his actions affect others.

    I need to stand firm and do what is best for my son.

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