i moved into my partners house (he owns it) with my 2 children, 9&12, 18 months ago. I pay 500pm to him which is half the bills, I also buy food and contribute extra to cover my children’s food. Prior to moving in with him I received tax credits as a single parent only earning 300 per week. I work every day school hours and work hard for everything. The children’s dad gives me 60pw for both children but unfortunately it is irregular and not something I can depend on. I spend a reasonable amount on the children, ensuring that they always have nice things and go to clubs etc.
I have recently had a baby with my new partner and I’m now receiving statutory maternity pay which is around 140 per week. My partner said when I was pregnant that he doesn’t want to have to support my other 2 children whilst I’m on mat leave and that I would need to think of a way to earn some extra£!!??? I managed to put some money aside so I can continue to pay half towards the bills and food and pay for my other children but I can’t help feeling that this is unfair. Partner is off work at the moment due to covid but he is financially stable with savings and a well paid job when he goes back to work. I will be taking on 90% of care for baby including all night feeds but will still be paying half. I could suggest reducing my monthly bill contribution but I feel that he’d use it against me- he often reminds me that we live in his house which makes me feel unsettled.
I was just wondering how other parents cope financially without receiving benefits whilst living with new partner.
I would suggest getting a cohabitation agreement of sorts drawn up with a solicitor so that you are both covered in terms of whatever financial agreement you have reached but mostly so that you have some security should the relationship not work out. I moved in to my exs house that was all in his name and despite him promising to add my name to the paper work it never happened. So when we split my options were either be homeless with my kids or be at his mercy as to whether he would let us stay in the house – we’ve since drawn up an agreement about the house and me and the kids have remained in it while he has left but it wasnt a nice position to be in. You and the kids need some security. You really both should get some advice from either citizens advice or a solicitor about what options are available to you bth for divvying everything up financially and for paying the bills and who gets what should you split. There are options to make it legally binding even if you are not married. Hope this helps