Finance help please. New to this!

Home Online forum Gingerbread Forum Finance help please. New to this!

Viewing 1 post (of 1 total)
  • Author
  • #15881 Report



    New to this but wondered how helpful it may be in providing advice in my situation?

    I am a single 40 year old mother with two beautiful children, aged 3 and 7.

    I left our family home June 2017 after 3 years of emotional abuse. Myself and my children were put up by friends for 6 weeks until eventually I found a beautiful (but expensive) 2 bed flat that I have privately rented since.

    While looking for the flat I met with my ex partners parents (who now control his finances, due to his gambling addiction) to agree a monthly maintenance payment .His mother (also his accountant) advised me of his yearly earnings and we used the online calculator to agree a monthly sum to be paid. This figure came out as £275 a month .Due to my ex partners outgoings for a van bought on finance (totalling to nearly £400 a month) I disputed the £275 monthly payment and we agreed that £400 a month would be more acceptable. I based the affordability of my new property based on this

    The first 3 monthly maintenance payments of £400 were made in full, eventually after some disagreements after I only received £275 in September and October, I was then advised that as my ex partners self employed work had ‘dried up’ I was only going to be paid £275 a month (what the CSA website initially showed when his parents and I inputted my ex partners earnings)

    Since this time my ex partner has continued to live in the 3 bedroom house that his parents bought for him and he pays rent to. Unknowingly to his parents (landlords) he has rented out 2 of the bedrooms and advised me of private cash work he does on a regular basis.

    I feel I am not receiving enough maintenance from my ex partner and am constantly struggling to make ends meet.  I feel like it is pointless for to start a case with the CSA, as my ex partners mother is his accountant and could (and would) put any figure she liked when doing his tax return.

    I am contemplating, contacting his mother to reassess the monthly maintenance payment I am paid as within the past year, his earnings on paper may have changed,  he is earning from sub letting his parents house and doing regular private work and not declaring it (to his parents or the HMRC) and my outgoings certainly have gone up (due to natural inflation) but am concerned that a, his mother will lie about his true earnings, b, I will get him in trouble with his parents or they won’t believe he is sub letting and doing regular private work.

    Currently my ex partner has no control of his bank account and is given  £100 a week (£400 a month) by his parents from his own earnings for his weekly shopping/ cigarettes etc. This is £100 a week for one person but I am expected to split the £275 a month I receive for two children, amounting to £35 a week for each child!

    Can anyone offer any advice or even just reassure me that I’m not being unreasonable! I’m not a money grabber, I own and run my own small business but am genuinely struggling financially!?

Viewing 1 post (of 1 total)

Log in or register to reply to this thread

Log In Register