Feeling worthless

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  • #56218 Report

    TaniaL
    Participant

    My husband & I have been separated for 11months. It was totally blindsided by it he has refused to talk to me about & there is no contact between us, he picks the kids up set times but there’s no exchange of  information. A wk ago a family member saw him out shopping with a woman, he had cheated on me previously with her & now I’m 100% positive that he has been having an affair, it makes sense all the behaviours before & after he left. I remained close with his mum & other family members but from their reaction I think they have known the entire time, its really hurt me. I’m now on my own dealing with this no family no friends & I’ve never felt so lost & stuck, I can’t afford a divorce or to move out of the area.

    #56377 Report

    Broken82
    Participant

    Hi Tania L.

    I’m so sorry that you are going through this. I’m 6 months in. My husband left in January moved in with a woman in Feb but said he wasn’t involved with her before our split. Our separation came out of nowhere. It has left me feeling like the worst human being in the world. I can barely live with myself. Just when I think I can’t feel worse I hear about the happy couple and all the fun they are having as a family when our son visits his Dad. I have not left the house in two months and I’m petrified I’m going to lose my children because of how bad my mental health is. I’m on a waiting list with the mental health crisis team but I’m deteriorating fast. I’m desperate for this nightmare to be over. I also can’t afford a divorce. I feel trapped and a burden. I was his queen one day and the reason for his life unhappiness the next. This is a side of a marriage break up that is hidden away and never discussed. The devastation is life changing.

    #57322 Report

    TaniaL
    Participant

    I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to reply I didn’t get any notification 😒  I hope you are feeling a bit stronger or have gotten some help❤️ I know it’s hard but please don’t attach your self worth to your exs behaviour. I know how hard it is to believe someone who you seen as a good person full of love and respect for you is also capable of walking away like you & your family means nothing to them but please believe that it is his loss He lost his family and he lost you. Focus on finding you again, being the best mum you can be to your son. I don’t know if you have friends or family (I don’t have anyone except my daughters) but spend time talking to ppl it’s how I ended up on this forum I needed to talk, I’m separated a yr now yes I still miss him and our family time but I don’t cry everyday i have started to **** meals again & keep on top of housework. It all passes til the next trauma happens xxx

     

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