Feeling overwhealmed

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  • #16812 Report

    Singlemumofone87
    Participant

    Sorry for the long story…My partner left me and my 3 year old daughter 3 months ago in our family home (joint owners), he said he just didnt love me and wasnt happy, and went straight to a solicitor to try and get us out the house so he can sell it as he holds a large lump sum in it. He offered me a tiny sum that would not last myself and daughter a year renting. We used to get a wage from his business he owns to pay for our food and our car, he stopped the wage and took our car back to dealers. He now has stopped paying the bills to our home to try and force us to sell as he knows I have no money. I have had to claim all benifits I can to pay bills. He pays some maintenace but not all as he still pays the mortgage (as he cannot aford to miss a payment as he wants a new property after ours and has very bad credit)My solicitor has advised me to stay in the property as long as possible and he will have to take me to court to force sale of the house. I’m struggling alone in the house as he has now got a new flat and moving on as he earns a very good wage and I feel stuck here trapped and scared of what will happen in the future and what his next solicitors letter will say… feeling very overwhelmed and finding each day a bit harder 🙁

    #16813 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Sorry to hear that. We are all here to listen. Sounds really like u r going through tough time.

    I am feeling low, for different reasons the place i live i have 6or 7 weeks of the tenancy left and i hate everyminute im here. It has been a nightmare and im currently viewing some properties hope i get somewhere cos i can’t stand it here

    #16815 Report

    Singlemumofone87
    Participant

    I’m sure you will find somewhere and so try to focus on knowing that you will be getting out of there soon and you will not be stuck somewhere you hate.

    I am at myour wits end with worry, I do not know how long it will be here or where I am going to after this. I am awaiting a reply from his it’s been over a week and still no reply, my solicitor has asked him to agree to a fairer sum of money so we can set up a new life renting. My daughter starts primary school next September and you have to choose by January but I just don’t know where we will be living if I will still be stuck here so there is that additional streets of working for her future. The not knowing im finding is such a struggle it’s almost suffocating me

    #16816 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    I ubderstand the feeling of when things get on top of u, cant relate to yiur exact situation but know feeling. Are your fanily helping out?

    #16817 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Ive had .ajor issues the floors all been rotten they havent replaced them all. Me and my son hv been bk n forth my mums. Im getting small slugs from one of the rooms (this room o hwvnt used for months as it smells damp and clearly the floor needed replacing tjere) i asked them to do wotk anf put me up somehere they said no and as landlord had gave me 100pounf that shud be enough to find somehere to stay if u dont wanna be there

    Had insect infestation, had no use of livig room for weeks and weeks. Had to move out but oh theh still get full rent and i cudnt get out of the tenancy earlier. Majorly depresses me

    #16820 Report

    Beth05
    Participant

    Gingey28 have you gone to the council as it sounds like environmental health should have a look. It sounds very unsafe for you and your child.

    Singlemumofone I would listen to your solicitor stay put as the courts may decide that the best thing is for them to put a contract in that he cannot sell the house until your child is 18. Stay stronge! Try and prioritise what bills are important. Take one day at a time.

     

    #16821 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Environmental health and everyone wudnt rly back my case up but i rang shelter yest said ive had nothing but issues. Theu expect to do work n me n my son to be there n tbrow in my face i got aome money off thr landlord. Well i shud have got more for all the upheavel. Reallu makes me depressed but i feel trapped and like i got no choice but to put up with it till i can leave. Really been horrible experience for me

     

    They did 2 floors but left somw pf tje hall and bedroom still to do. Theu don’t care i cant use the bedroom and i necer had access to living room for weeks and weeks as the insect prob arised days into the move. Shambles from start to finish hate being there im always out at family house no comfort or homely feel at all been rly stressful

    #16832 Report

    SillySally
    Participant

    I’m not sure how it works if you are not married as when my husband left I was told I could demand to stay in the house- but we had just finished an extension so we had an extra bedroom which meant I had to sell it as it was more than my needs..

    my only advice is that once you get out the house and have your own place and you are in charge you feel a real sense of freedom! Even if you are living off benefits and maintenance- you are in control not relying on him for money. Good luck!

    #16847 Report

    Singlemumofone87
    Participant

    Gingey28 yes I have a supportive family but everyone is getting a bit lost with all the legal jargon back and forth and have no advice as to what I should do anymore. I think it’s hard for them to relate as they are not in the situation.

    Beth05 thank you yes I think the only thing to do is take one day at a time as otherwise it all gets to much

    Sillysally I also have to many bedrooms I have been advised I can make an application to the court where he has to make a transfer of property  (a smaller one) until she is 18 but the court fees are extortionate and I feel I would also be trapped with him paying for it and not be able to break away from him and do everything for myself.

     

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