Feeling lonely and useless

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  • #28929 Report


    My husband walked out on the family home 3 weeks ago telling me he didnt love me- to say it came as a shock is an understatement!! I’m trying so hard to keep positive for my boys (age 8 and 4) but  really struggle at nightimes with the loneliness. My husband hasn’t made much of an effort to see our boys and so I haven’t had any ‘time off’ since he walked and typically he wants them this saturday but none of my friends are available so I will still be alone!!!!! Hes given me little money so am struggling to keep my boys amused in the holidays due to husband being main breadwinner. Sorry for rant!!! 

    #28934 Report


    Hi there Sheeno79,

    I’m sorry to hear this is how you are feeling- I may not be able to fully relate but I have experience the lonely nights.

    Try picking up something new or something to keep you busy

    Netflixs, New hobby/new craft/indulge yourself in new book

    Maybe it can be something simple like doing something you have been putting off

    Theres loads to do with boys too xx

    Google things and services in your area for the holidays.


    Also have you, asked your Ex for extra help financially?



    #28987 Report


    Hi Sheena, that’s rotten. No wonder you are feeling down.

    I think I’d use the time for something that’s hard to do when the kids are around. Firstly I’d check the CMs calculator on how much your ex should be giving you.

    And I’d get some non-child food & a bottle of wine and then I’d pull out the autumn wardrobe and work out what needs replacing.

    Or redecorate/ freshen up a room while you have the house to yourself.

    Or give yourself a manicure/pedicure/box set. Or try a new recipe that your children probably wouldn’t eat.

    I hope you have a better weekend than you are expecting x

    #28995 Report


    Hi Sheeno,

    Please don’t apologise for the rant, it’s what the forum is for 🙂

    Both Kathy and Godslove have given some great advice but it’s worth saying again that it’s essential to go to the CMS as it’s not fair to leave you without money.

    All the best


    #29009 Report


    Hi Sheeno

    am alone with my 2 y/o boy since my husband left.

    I totally get that evenings are lonely. All suggestions given are great. I personally discovered Peaky Blinders, which the ex refused to watch. And a soak in the bath after the little un is in bed makes an early night a pleasure, and I don’t have to stay up to spend ‘quality time’ with anyone.

    My son is younger than yours, but there are a couple of paddling pools at local parks near me, and that makes a good afternoon out with a few sandwiches and drinks. Check out what your local library might offer, some do craft sessions, or have Lego clubs etc. Either free or minimal charge.

    Yep, def check CMS and also see if you are entitled to any benefits. There are some easy to use online calculators, and Gingerbread has an advice line you can call,

    Hope the weekend gives you some much needed time off. You may find you are so tired when you get the chance to sit down, that all you want to do anyway is lounge around.

    Take care


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