Feeling lonely and fed up
19 February 2018 at 8:13 pm #7857
Hi empty, how are you?19 February 2018 at 8:23 pm #7859
Totally empty. Got my MIAM today and am completely lost in paperwork and confusion. The mediator was very nice and encouraging (mostly) but today has been yet another day without my children and it’s like being imprisoned for something you didn’t do and not being given an actual release date to scratch on the walls.
Not sure I’m good company. Feeling a bit lonely. And angry. One of my psychologist friends says anger is a good stage to be at providing it doesn’t spill over. But it can help provide the energy to get things done sometimes. For the first two months I didn’t eat or sleep and just stared at their photos. She told me to put them away and I felt very disloyal, but it has actually helped.
How about you?19 February 2018 at 8:41 pm #7861
I’m ok just like you lost in paperwork as applying to the courts for a child arrangement order and getting the divorce going at the same time.its 3 sets of the same application for the cao and its 26 pages each set😮19 February 2018 at 8:45 pm #7864
Hi guys- I’m a mum to 8 year old twins- I’m glad I found this site as sometimes you can sit alone and feel there is something wrong with yourself to feel so alone and unworthy of company so it’s nice to know it’s more common than not albeit not nice for anyone to feel. Despite arranging with my ex for myself to have the twins today he went and arranged other parents to have them! He had just had them for this half term and despite myself their Mum being available to quite frankly look after my own children- he did that. Quite beyond belief really and instead of him then apologising to these other parents that me their mum who had also arranged a day out for them he just continued with them going to their friends. He was even aware I had spoke to my girl twin this week who had said how much she was missing me and still did it anyway. I would say I have no words but I had quite a few choice words that I distributed his way today. So hi from me “a survivor of my ex” and mummy to wonderful twins who right now cannot stand each other either but “tomorrow is another day” x19 February 2018 at 9:15 pm #7866
Hi miss crosspatch,i’m rich from ipswich and also a survivor of the ex.how are you?19 February 2018 at 10:21 pm #7871
Im 26 and a single dad to a 2 year old.
I work 2 days a week which help as i get some social interaction at work but it is very lonely the rest of week.
I try to keep myself busy with my son and walks around the parks/woods.
Tv is my friend at the moment lol, allthough im looking to pick up a hobbie at home soon. Have you thought about any hobbies you can do to keep you busy.19 February 2018 at 10:27 pm #7872
Im a single mum to two girls, 3 years of being a single mum and still find the evenings so lonely28 February 2018 at 6:38 pm #8172
How are you doing today? I know life can feel like shit sometimes, I have felt suicidal before and phoned The Samaritans which was the most helpful thing I could have imagined. The person on the phone just let me talk about everything I needed to. I made decisions after that that are becoming to turn my life around.
What I am trying to say is “It will pass”, and if you keep putting the work in it will work out. Not necessarily how we might want it to but some things are blessings in disguise, we just need to wait for the good things to come. And they will. Trust in the Universe, even though trust may feel like an empty word right now.
Take one day at a time.
Hugs X28 February 2018 at 7:05 pm #8173
Thank you Mellymel. Been watching the snow fall and remembering how much the children thought it was magical and loved playing in it. Can’t fathom what she gains from totally excluding me from their life. There is that story about the ring of Solomon which cheers you up when you are at your lowest and depresses you when you’re at your highest. Written on the ring is the phrase “This moment shall pass”. But some moments seem to last longer than others, don’t they?
Thanks again.2 March 2018 at 12:35 am #8211
I felt so lonely today and everyday really and I feel desperately sad. The snow fell today and I took my little 15 month year old for a walk down the street and garden. Dad is not here. He just convicted again of beating me with her in my arms and ended up with various punishments and a 3 year restraining order and told him to go through a solicitor for contact. He has nothing to offer her. He has done so many bad things, told so many lies, been so deceitful. I’m scared he will get contact albeit in a contact centre. In reality he is not interested in her and will do it for papers to remain in the UK and family pressure – a family that don’t even call me to see how she is. This is terrifying me and preoccupies my mind every second – that and going over all of our relationship and the things he did and how I tried to struggle on as I did not want her to grow up without a dad and I so badly wanted us to be a family, a team. He couldn’t be nice to us, didn’t even call on her birthday, but called three days after as he wanted money – he’s an addict and thinks he’s some sort of cool gangster type
Also I feel so lonely and washed up. Get this… I am in very late 40s with my miracle baby. I would love to find a nice man to be part of our family, but no one wants a late 40s year old (albeit a young in mind and looks one – that doesn’t matter, the number does!) with a toddler they are still breastfeeding and co-sleeping and with all this baggage … so there is no one. It’s not just the evenings after she sleeps, it’s the weekends when all the happy families are about, it’s someone to carry her on his shoulders, go to the beach with, make decisions with, go shopping with – just choosing a shower suit would have been nice for someone to be there to say ‘hey, what do you think of this?’ Not all the time, just here and there. No family for support.
I’m in real couple envy – no it’s happy family envy. All the ladies in playgroups etc moan about this and that – but they go home to someone. If it wasn’t for my baby I wouldn’t want to breathe….this life is so hard – I can’t get over how happy I should have been this last 15 months – just stolen off me2 March 2018 at 12:36 am #8212
And yes Empty, some moments seem to go on far too long.