2 October 2019 at 4:05 pm #31044
It’s tough going isn’t it! I’m well aware that reaching out, making an effort to break the cycle is the best thing to do, but it’s easier said than done. Hate the loneliness, but not really in the right mindset to do anything about it – it’s very frustrating. I am trying harder to get out of that viscious circle but with the darker nights, colder weather etc it’s going to take a big effort, I know that much!2 October 2019 at 4:26 pm #31045
You’re right, trying harder doesn’t work. Have to try different as you say to break the cycle. It’s such a good feeling when you do. Don’t give up.2 October 2019 at 4:40 pm #31047
Hope you get to your class Sam! I’ve been separated 4 years now and put on loads of weight – it massively got me down. I joined Slimming World in January and have lost almost 4 stone. I feel hugely better in so many different ways! I see you work part time. I’m currently not going out to work and have a lot of time on my hands. I started volunteering for the Gloucestershire Wildlife Trust and I love it. Being outside really lifts your mood and i’ve met some great people. I don’t meet up with them outside work but it’s just good to have adult conversation and everyone has similar interests. I imagine there will be a similar group near you if you’re interested in that kind of thing!2 October 2019 at 5:05 pm #31049
Completely agree that being outside does wonders for your mindset. When I can see I’m getting stuck in a rut, I make it part of my weekend to get out early and find somewhere nice to walk. As corny as it sounds there’s something really therapeutic in it. Ok, it doesn’t necessarily address the loneliness, but it puts me in a more positive mindset for the rest of the weekend. It’s early days for me, but I’ve identified pretty quickly that small things like that do alot of good. Hopefully that better mindset will naturally lead to being more social, meeting new people and reducing the loneliness.2 October 2019 at 8:35 pm #31056
So I didn’t go to my class, ended up binge eating again. I want to do slimming world again but…. just can’t keep on it and struggle with meal planning. The more lonely I feel the more rubbish I feel the less I can be around anyone…. it’s not fair2 October 2019 at 9:08 pm #31057
Volunteering sounds like a great idea, especially outdoors. Meet new people and enjoy wildlife. Sounds awesome, a welcome break from any office job!2 October 2019 at 9:30 pm #31058
Sam good to hear from you. How old are your kids. Its hard to have a seperate life when ur committed to ur kids then they are away from u. Its hard to adjust from parent to single life. It only works for us if there are others in similar situations2 October 2019 at 9:53 pm #31061
Try not to beat yourself up! There’s always tomorrow… besides, I’m sitting here with a packet of biscuits despite only being 2lbs from my target. I ought to be extra good this week!! Could you do exercise in the morning? I go swimming as soon as the kids leave the house for the bus – it’s a good start to the day. I know I’m less motivated by the evening! If you do go back to Slimming World I’d be very happy to support you. I’ve had a friend encouraging me from afar via text!
In reply to Welshdad, joining the wildlife trust was one of the best things i’ve done over the past few years of singledom! I was honestly the last person to want to get outside in the rain and mud with a bow saw but now i love it!2 October 2019 at 10:31 pm #31064
I would definitely recommend meetups.com. kids at there dad’s just search what meet ups you might fancy doing and just go. Good luck2 October 2019 at 11:01 pm #31068
I’ve just found a post from someone in Ramsgate wanting to meet up and there were a couple of replies. Don’t know if that’s anywhere near you…
Just type Ramsgate in search box at top : )2 October 2019 at 11:18 pm #31069
I’m running a meetup event this Saturday (as I do every Saturday). There’ll be at least 50 people there and after some fun activity we’ll all be heading out for a Thai dinner (we eat a different cuisine every week).
I won’t give the details of the group as I don’t want to seem like I’m advertising it – despite the fact that it’s a non-profit – but that’s one of about 30 Meetup groups I’ve joined! These are groups focused on a range of different things – one’s around a sport I enjoy, one’s a group for foreigners, one involves learning Ceroc dancing, one’s movie based… and there are many others.
If a person is willing to try new things and make an effort to travel a few miles there’s so much of choice it’s crazy. This is especially true if you live in one of the cities, or anywhere in the southeast. Oh my goodness, in or near London – one of the most culturally diverse cities in the world – and you really are spoilt for choice. Whatever your choice of activity, and whatever the day/time of the week you’re free to do it, there’s a group around that’s right for you!3 October 2019 at 8:39 pm #31095
I’m new to the forum. I understand where you are coming from, my ex walked out on me and two young kids 6 months ago. Feel like I’m stuck and cant move on with my life and go to bed same time as kids most nights to avoid the lonely evenings. I’m in Kent too and local group is now I active due to coordinator stepping down. Got too much on my plate to consider stepping up to the role.10 October 2019 at 9:56 pm #31423
I feel the same! I do have weekends when I hardly come out of the house! I’ve started running for the past 6 months and this has helped with my confidence a little! I am trying to pluck up the courage to start visiting the gym! Look after yourself!10 October 2019 at 10:08 pm #31424
Hi hows you doing this week Sam hope your feeling better this week and Andy just go for it…I used to be like that. I was a runner then I got injured and had to give the gym a go…they not that bad. One thing I would say is maybe try some classes as it a great way to meet people and get used to the gym. One thing it does do is makes you feel a whole lot better. Those endorphins do the trick. Good luck31 October 2019 at 3:14 pm #32269
Hi. I’m Helen. I’m new to the forum & I’ve just moved too. Been single for 6 years in January. I find the loneliness terrible. It’s so hard to meet someone nowadays.