Sounds like he’s had a bit of a breakdown. Either way he needs to do his bit and courts will help with this. How you feel is pretty much how we all feel. And it will get a lot worse. And then things will settle and it will get better. It may never get best, but who knows, it might. You just have to be strong. You have to, because it’s just you and the children. Try for mediation and see what’s on his mind. And he has to understand he can’t just leave and leave the situation as it is.
Feel for you. I used to say I didn’t understand how this happened to me. Now I say why does it happen to anyone at all?