Father wants me to drive my newborn 3 hours to see him

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  • #63721 Report


    My baby’s father lives over 150 miles away from me. His parents, sister, niece and nephews all live in my city. He has seen my daughter 4 times totalling less than 14 days since she was born. He says that it is now my responsibility to take my daughter to his house to see him. The drive is a minimum of 3 hours if no traffic. My daughter is only 11 weeks old. He has said that if I continue to refuse to take her there then he will come and fetch her and I will have to express my breast milk if I want her to continue to be breastfed.

    I have told him that it is not healthy for her to travel for that length of time at her age. I would also have to arrange for my older child to be looked after if I was to take her there. He has no equipment at his house for a baby. All his family are here.

    Is it unreasonable for me to insist that he does the travelling whilst she is a baby. Would a court force me to take her there. I am now scared to allow him access to her even at his parents house in case he takes her or gives her formula milk.

    #63786 Report


    I think he is being unreasonable. I have been through the courts while newborn child involved. I don’t think they like to disrupt the child at such a young age as they know the baby needs the mother more at this early stage. I saw my little one in a local coffee shop, around 1 or 2 hours a month initially. If I was in his position I would travel down and see the baby for a day visit. or if more time needed, he can book a cheap hotel in the area to stay the night.

    #63830 Report


    He’s defo being unreasonable. Had a hearing 2 months ago and ex wanted me to take my 18 month old to spent the night with him 150miles away.  The judge didn’t agree, he still drives here now every week for supported contact.

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