Falling in love with the mother of my kids again

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  • #40503 Report


    I would like to get some feedback and support. I am dad to 2 kids aged 4 and 5, divorced since they were 1 and 2. We went through a very acrimonious divorce with legal proceedings lasting 3 years until a few months ago. As soon as the lockdown came into force, we started cooperating and helping each other, she was working in an essential environment so I was looking after the children most of the time but she came over to me to help, we spent weekend days together, having meals and playing games together, acting basically like a family. The lockdown over here is now over, things have gone back to normal arrangements and I am feeling I miss her and the family set-up that was in place during this time, basically the first time ever. The children obviously thrived in this period. I have been in another relationship for a while with a childless woman which is OKish but now I feel I would rather be together with my ex together with the children as a family. From what I understand she is desperately seeking a relationship – registered on numerous dating sites and also checking out pansexuality / hetroflexibility. We are both in our mid-late 40s. The friends I have spoken to say I am crazy thinking about raising the idea of getting back together with my ex who made my life hell for 3 years utilising the children for her aims, but I am yearning for the family to reunite and I feel it would do so good for the kids to have a single family unit with both parents together and put the past behind us. I’m also not quite sure how to raise it with my ex, and I’m not yet sure whether it would be a good idea, because if things explode again the children will suffer in the way that they didn’t when they were babies.

    #40516 Report


    Hello Mickey,

    it is beautiful that you feel this way , and that the lockdown brought the best of both you .
    But it seems that you were more in love with the idea of having a family will be .
    Without the kids , are you in love with this person ? Would like to wake up every morning to her side?

    Because the kids are not going to be kids forever next 10 years would fly and you would end with her . It is what you want . I know children make our decisions harder but this is about the person you love not about the most suitable situation or our dream situation.
    maybe all this good cooperation in the past week smooth the situation for you and your ex.

    I am single mum and I would love to meet someone but it wouldn’t be keen to be back with my ex , because of the history. it is very hard to more forward the damage already done.

    At the end of this it is your call and her , in whatever way I wish you the best .


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