Extremely worried mum

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  • #47461 Report


    Help please. Asking for advice around my daughter seeing her dad (my ex)


    He has a new gf and they don’t live together. He lives with his highly vulnerable mum due to having an operation but still has his new gf and her 8 year old son stay at his house and he has stayed at her house before his mums op.


    My concern is he didn’t tell me about his gf until just before Christmas and he has been seeing our daughter on odd occasions during the pandemic. I feel he has unnecessarily put myself and my support bubble (my retired parents) at risk.


    Am I within my rights to stop my daughter seeing him?


    Any advice/help would be much appreciated.

    #47475 Report


    I’d say you are very much well within your rights!

    Someone else not in your bubble has been brought into it.

    It’s your job to safeguard even if he isn’t.

    #47477 Report


    His girlfriend is allowed to stay around your ex partners as that would be her support bubble. I think its best you have a chat with your ex partner about it as common sense is the best approach. As long as your ex partner is only seeing his girlfriend and vice versa shouldnt be a problem. He should let u know if anyone has symptoms then your daughter could have contact another time.

    he sees his daughter on odd occasion and also looking after his vulnerable mum he would be sacrificing his girlfriend which doesnt seem right. If he was blatantly flouting the rules and meeting who he liked etc of course that would be irresponsible

    #47493 Report



    The question seems to be, why is it important to ask the question of rights, when the first and foremost question should be, what would that mean to your daughter. Children are explicitly exempt from those rules and restrictions to keep their ability to see both of their parents. And rightly so. We all have to make sacrifices now, and we all have to take some risks and compromise if we have children when we weight the risks of the pandemic and the wellbeing of our children. Asking her father to try to reduce the risks for your parents is probably a way to go and then finding a compromise might be the next step.

    #49362 Report



    I think the main issue here is that you’re never really sure if he’s sticking to the rules or not and finding out he’s been seeing his gf and son after the fact cemented that for you. It’s hard cause I’m sure he’s not meaning to be disrespectful but everyone is so divided with their opinions on the pandemic.

    But you have to do what’s right for you and your family. It’s your decision but make sure it’s explained to your daughter and they will both have to just look forward to making up time lost when this is all done with.


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