Hi, this is my first post and don’t know how to fit everything into a short space. Basically, I left emotionally abusive relationship 3 months ago. We have a 20 month old son together (I also have 2 older children). Ex has hardly shown any interest in our son and threatens me not to go for child maintenance as things ‘will get nasty.’ He has the family home which we have paid for jointly but it’s in his name and I am left paying extortionate rent with nothing to show for it. He is using access to son as a way to control me by telling me he can’t commit to anything as he has to ‘take care of his own well being’ and when he does have him he picks him up just in time for bed and drops him back before lunch so he doesn’t have to feed him – I’ve even had to send food a couple of times. Things have gotten out of control as I was supposed to go out eith friends tomorrow and he’s caused murder over it as he is convinced I’m going on date. He told me at 10.30pm that he can’t have son now so I now can’t go out. How do I go about putting an end to this?
There is a lot more to this with control and games etc but so long winded to type – hold it makes sense as it is 😬
We were engaged but never married. We bought house together and he’s promised that on the future he will give me some mkney from it but the underlying threats imply if I go after child support I won’t get a penny from my house.
I agree I have to try to regain control and stop allowing him to dictate my life – everything is just so stressful at the moment 😟
Thanks. I think I’ve been putting off taking any action as I’m scared of repurcussions but even if I do as he wants he will always find a way to cause me stress so I agree with you I need to be strong and put my foot down and stop allowing him to walk all over me.
Thank you for taking time to reply – it does help having some back up reinforcing that what I NEED to do is the right thing