Ex no longer wanting a relationship with unborn baby

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  • #47892 Report

    Cloudyrainbows
    Participant

    Hi there, I separated with my ex when I was 4 months pregnant. I knew something wasn’t right and that he just wasn’t the guy for me, but I always believed he was a good man and would be a great dad. So we agreed to stay friends and he has been so very involved- messaging me daily to ask about the baby and how I am, offering to help me with any jobs I need doing and generally appearing to be being very supportive.
    I was then contacted 5 days ago by a woman who it turns out is not only his new girlfriend but was actually already seeing him on and off when we were together. She was apparently mortified to find out about me and our unborn child. He’s obviously desperately scrambling to rescue that relationship and has sent me a cold message saying he wants nothing to do with me or the baby and to leave him off the birth certificate. He’s then blocked me from every form of contact.
    it just makes no sense to me at all.

    i am a 35 year old professional woman and I have great family support so I know that practically I will be fine. But I just feel so devastated and emotional and I’m struggling to feel positive at all. I’m 31 weeks now and clearly need to pull myself together for the sake of my unborn son but I’m feeling in such turmoil- heartbroken at the level of deceit I have encountered and the rejection I feel on behalf of my son, but also struggling to think positively about my future. I really thought we would co-parent amicably.

     

     

    any words of wisdom?

    #47898 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    hi,

     

    I am sorry to hear you are going through this. I hope it works out well for you. I found a similar thread here. please check it out:

    #47899 Report

    warwickshire1
    Participant

    Sorry to hear about what has happened. The best thing you can do is albeit hard is leave your ex to it. Baby hasnt been born yet and its very early stages. He may decide to contact you once baby is born. He has blocked you , that is either done by him personally or influenced by his girlfriend. If he wants to contact you he can easily unblock you etc. When baby is born he will no doubt have to pay child maintenance towards bringing up your son and hopefully he does the decent thing and plays a part in your sons life growing up.

    #47923 Report

    Sonzie2
    Participant

    Hi there, I’m so sorry to hear what you are going through.  All I can say to you is you are the mother to a beautiful boy – honestly he is so so precious.  There is a very special bond between mother and son in my experience.  Im sure a lot of what is going on with your ex is to do with his new partner but once he sees his son it will be very hard for him to reject that child. If he does stay away you will have your beautiful baby boy who you will love and he will love you more than anything and without conditions.  Please say strong because you will have an unconditional love soon with your baby xxx

    #47924 Report

    Cloudyrainbows
    Participant

    Thanks all so much. I know I will be ok eventually, it just feels hard to work through the turmoil I feel at the moment and hate not being in control, ha! I’m so disappointed that someone I thought I could trust to be a friend and great dad has made this U turn but equally glad I know now and not later on.

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