Ex moving on

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  • #29412 Report


    Hello kind people,

    I am after some advice please…again.

    I found out yesterday that my ex moved on with someone else. He ‘accidentally’ shared their conversation with me. I ignored it because I dont want to cause issues and because it doesnt matter. If he did it by mistake or to cause a reaction. But I felt sick. We only separated in May 2019 and in June we were on holiday together with our little boy (it was already arranged and he wanted to go), isnt it too soon to have another relationship ? In the message I read he was saying that he has feelings for her as well.. Anyway, none of my business what he does. My question is should i tell him I know? Or its none of my business and he will tell me when the time is right?

    Also, he is trying to buy me out and because I wanted to help him not being homeless, I said I would accept less money and he can give me less money for child maintenance as well so he can manage. Nothing was signed yet, but now I feel stupid for being nice and offering to help him whilst he is spending his money on other women (drinks, dinner, flowers, shoes and a dress apparently) and I am thinking of taking it back. Especially the child maintenance money that dont even belong to me but our son. Is this unreasonable?

    thank you

    #29493 Report


    My husband walked out in May, leaving our three children and myself,(is currently pregnant with his fourth child.) Within days I heard rumours of an affair which was denied by both involved. Then last month he told me he was with her.

    He doesn’t pay towards the mortgage but has decided he wants half the house. He’s never contributed instead was saving all his money for an extension we had planned but then transferred all money into his name and walked off with 13 grand.

    I can’t believe he didn’t give it time to get a place sorted so could have proper contact with the children or let alone let this baby be born.

    I would not do your ex any favours by helping him financially as clearly he’s not thinking of you.

    Make him pay what he owes as like you said it’s for your child.

    #29510 Report


    My ex had an affair so I understand the hurt when you find out they are with someone else. It hurts but in time it does get easier. I think financially you have to do what is fair. Don’t accept any less than what he should give. The maintenance is for your child not for you so I don’t think you should be making his life easier while making your own life more difficult. It needs to be fair for all or there will be bad feeling somewhere down the line. Tell him you’ve looked at finances again and you just can’t manage on any less than what he should give. I hope you get it sorted out.

    #29558 Report


    Thank you everyone 🙂  xx

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