Ex girlfriend is pregnant – advice needed

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  • #42012 Report



    I’m new here.

    My ex girlfriend is pregnant, only 5 weeks.

    We are not in a relationship and had a couple of nights a while back and here we are.

    Unfortunately the reason we ended the relationship has not gone away, and we are for the vast majority of times just incompatible.

    She is not being particularly amicable about anything, and is looking to shut me out of every part of the pregnancy, and is threatening to try to restrict my access when the baby is born – she has threatened to say i emotionally abuse her and things like that(which are not true)

    It worries me, because whilst i want to be as involved as possible – including during the pregnancy, i accept that it is all in her hands at this point, however, I want to do what I can to ensure that I have fair access when the baby is born.

    Does anyone know what I can do to ensure that?

    Do I have any rights here? Can she just say what she wants and people will take that as gospel and deny me access etc?

    Feeling very lost, and hoping for some advice and help if possible

    Thanks for reading.



    #42330 Report


    Just let her go through her pregnancy, stress free.

    You have no rights until the baby is born.

    Apply to get a DNA test done, you will need this to be added to the babys birth certificate. You may need to apply for this through family court.

    Once your name is on the certificate,  you are given 50/50 parental responsibility of the child.

    During this process, go to the child maintenance service online, calculate your income and find out how much you should be paying to your child each week/month.

    Be paying this into a separate account and keeping diary entries etc.

    Once you’re equipped with all of this, apply for mediation. If she refuses, this will go in your favour and you can take it to family court to gain access. Depending on your working hours, u may be entitled to 50% child care.

    But you really need to be on your best behaviour. Dont threaten her. Dont pressure her. Leave her to go through the pregnancy. Otherwise, u risk giving her ammunition for court.

    Just do some internet research or citizens advice, on how to obtain the family mediators contact information from.

    The less contact with her right now, the better.

    Unfortunately for any woman who has had emotional abuse from their babys dad, doesn’t affect the dads rights to have access to his Child… so fortunate for you. Just behave and you’ll be fine

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