Ex coming in my house

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  • #10532 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    I don’t really know what to think. I left my ex 5 years ago. I set up home on my own with my children. He had nothing to do with my new house. I bought a dog. Again after I left.

    However when I am not there he keeps turning up for a cup of tea with my 19 year old. Then he will take my dog out. I have asked him not to come in my house when I am not there but he is ignoring my requests. He comes in and wanders upstairs. Makes himself a cup of tea etc. Drinks my beer and watches my tv when I am not there. The kids know how I feel and so does he. I feel violated all the time yet he still does it. I left him becaus he was so controlling. He is still doing it.

     

    I got some security cameras at the weekend. Sure enough I have it recorded that he has been in. Made himself some tea. Wandered upstairs. Took the dog a walk. Went in my fridge.

    Is it me just thinking that this is not on? What are my rights. I have never stopped him seeing the girls  ever. But I don’t want him wandering around my house when I am not there. Or even if I am there.

    #10534 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    This is a violation of the Human Rights Act, Article 8. I would speak with a solicitor and ask them to send him a letter. It will cost you £50 or whatever, but should stop him. He could also be arrested for trespass (though you might be asked questions why you gave him a key in the first place).

    http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1998/42/schedule/1/part/I/chapter/7

    Make sure you can say you’ve had the conversation with him and he ignores your wishes – you have to have told him first before escalating.

    #10538 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    He hasn’t got a key. My daughter lets him in. I have sent him messages asking him not to come in my house when I am not there with a response from him (as proof that I have asked him not to enter). As my daughter lets him in …..does that affect my rights.

    #10539 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    No, Article 8 means he should ask your permission first. Same as if he was your landlord – he’d still have to ask permission and not just wander in, even though he owns the property. Have you spoken with your daughter about it?

    #10540 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    Yes. I have told her that I am not comfortable with it and also shown her the messages that I have sent him.

    #10541 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    Well, as I say, might be worth £50 for a letter from a solicitor.

    Some links that may help:

    Support with any parenting problem: Family Lives 9am-9pm weekdays, 10am-3pm weekends FREE helpline 0808 800 2222 http://familylives.org.uk

    Publicly funded legal advice and/or representation: http://www.justice.gov.uk/legal-aid-for-private-family-matters

    #10542 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    Thank you.

    #10599 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    It has got to the point that I don’t want to wake up tomorrow.

    #10600 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    Wake up, do, but take the day off work and hide in the kitchen, then, when he goes to help himself to a beer, you can give him a heart attack. Problem solved.

    #10603 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    <span style=”color: #1a1919; font-family: Lato, sans-serif; background-color: #fbfbfb;”>itcinadcerrbtly? Can you just clarify, please?</span>

    #10606 Report

    jeb1967
    Participant

    Well it is another day. Part of me feels I just have to accept how it is. But I am pretty down.

    #10607 Report

    Empty
    Participant

    You don’t have to accept it at all, for the reasons stated – did you even try the links or suggestions?

    #10608 Report

    Schubert
    Participant

    Hiya, I agree with Empty. You don’t have to put up with this. You haven’t invited him into your house. if he wants to see the kids can he see them away from your property?

    You’re entitled to live peacefully and without worry.

    Take care

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)

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