Ex admitted affair during mediation

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    My ex moved out in January, although we had our problems I wasn’t expecting it. He turned up at the start of April and told me and our two girls (10 and 7) that he was moving in with our neighbour, three doors up. We first met her at a party last October. He said he hadn’t cheated and he had only been with her a few weeks. I struggled to cope and after shouting across the street to her thought I’d better move in with my Mum to give myself a bit of time.

    we started mediation and had to do it by video call-he didn’t want to be in the same room as me so it took forever- the mediator came from him and said that ‘it just happened’ and he was going to leave anyway. I was devastated… then he sent the mediator a letter that ended up, with his consent, being shared with me that said they had been together since the party we went to as a family.
    Im really struggling to cope with this. I don’t want my girls to go round to see her because they already feel torn but he’s pushing and doesn’t really understand their emotional state.

    He initially told the girls they could go round and see him anytime which I have really fought hard against because I don’t think it is safe- I don’t know what to do or say for the best- I hate this situation and feel trapped- has anyone else been in this situation- perhaps where children have had to go and play happy families with a parent who had an affair? How do I get through this, especially through lockdown?

    #40289 Report


    Hi Debwarr,

    That sounds like an awful situation and your concerns understandable. Could you suggest the children meeting him outside, like going to a park or for a walk instead of at the house? Here to chat if you feel like it.

    #40300 Report

    Family Time

    Iam so sorry to hear this it’s disgusting behaviour shame on them both , my estranged husband has moved in with his gf and her three daughters he’s known her 9 weeks I’m crushed and struggling to function most days he’s splashed his relationship all over social media loud and proud does no one have any morals these days ?? I understand your concerns and how you feel , here of you want to talk x

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