Dreading Christmas

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  • #46285 Report

    lovemyteenagers@49
    Participant

    Anyone else dreading Christmas?  This is my first as a single parent although we’ve not had happy ones for many years but i feel the pressure is on for it to be different this year but i don’t know how to make the changes that would make it better than before.  I’ve looked into volunteering but its very limited  because of COVID & I’d only really want to do something where i could take my teenagers with me which again limits what we could do.

    #46291 Report

    roger
    Participant

    Hi you don’t have to be that much different this year sometimes the simple things make the best memories

    Roger

    #46295 Report

    Shepherdess
    Participant

    Hi it’s the same for me and I’ve decided to totally change things up so nothing  is as it was but also some focus , different food , with family whereas we usually have just us and family games ( which is always a no as he hated them as was such a bad loser )

    Here are some tips I read online :

    It is just one day , try not to get too anxious about it.

    Talk to your kids and ask what they want to do , plan your favourite movies , maybe a nice walk out to walk off the Christmas dinner

    Enjoy spending time with them and maybe try not to put too much pressure on yourself , if the years prior you mention haven’t been great this year hopefully will be more relaxed without overthinking that one day , treasure what you now have together as a unit

     

     

     

    #46342 Report

    Teacherman
    Blocked

    Hiya I know the feeling!  I have 2 kids and i see them.boxing day so not sure what I will be doing Xmas day lol x

    #46599 Report

    TinaA
    Participant

    Hi

    You say the pressure is on to make it different. Who is putting the pressure on? Your children (and you) have already been through plenty of change, so will more change be overwhelming? When it happened to me I made tweaks instead of big changes so part of the day still felt familiar. We went out in the morning and that helped as otherwise the day could have been long. Then we ate dinner on trays on our laps in front of the tv instead of at the dining table. and it worked as it was all so relaxed. This year will be our 3rd Christmas and it’s the first one I’ve looked forward to.
    if it’s really overwhelming remember it’s just one day. You’re in charge so do what works for you.
    Take care x

    #46618 Report

    sirtobi
    Participant

    Hello,

    I remember the first Christmas as a single parent very well. It was an emotional challenge as we were still in the midst of all the struggle and completely broke. The new house was almost empty, builder stuff lying around, the heating didn’t work and we had only two beds and two armchairs for the three of us. On the 24th we managed to buy the Christmas decoration and tree from our local flower shop for a fiver, as it was closing until February. They even delivered to our house. Then we got all the boxes with Christmas stuff out from among the boxes where all our clothing and personal items were in, which we had gathered from family and friends, started  the fireplace and began to decorate the house and put up the Christmas tree. Tesco had whole fresh salmon reduced in the afternoon, 5KG for a fiver and all the veggies needed were reduced to five or ten pennies the lot. That was our Christmas dinner for three days. During the night the few presents came up on the mantelpiece and at seven in the morning youngest one was up and running through a very cold house. The videos I took this year are the most watched ones from our 20 years of video collection. The Christmas tree was up until March and only thrown away after we cut a few branches and stored them in a plastic container. And apart from the salmon and the broken heating, most of what happened that year has become a fixture of our Christmas celebration ever since.

    The message I want to relay is, just do what you can and it will be enough. The attitude counts and the love. Have a wonderful Christmas.

    #46884 Report

    Clara
    Participant

    Sirtobi,

    this brought a tear to my eye. Thanks for your story. Being together with loved ones is what Christmas is truly about. We make it work no matter what. I hope you all have a fabulous Christmas, especially after the year we’ve had.

    #46892 Report

    Renata L
    Participant

    Hi. These are very nice tips, I like them. We are so busy solving problems that we forget what we are solving them for in the first place. Right now we need to calm down a bit and enjoy time with our loved ones, I am sure it will help to start the new year more lightly.

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