Does single parenting affect children??

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  • #61875 Report

    bubbacee
    Participant

    Hi everyone, I’m new here. I’m afraid and struggling with the thought of becoming a single mum but I think it is inevitable I might becoming one soon. I just wanted to know how will this affect my child’s well-being and growth? Will my baby be affected emotionally because her dad won’t be around with her? My baby is 15 months old. Thank you everyone.

    #61883 Report

    Ishtar
    Participant

    I have been a single parent for over 5 years now in theory ( in practice it was a lot longer as my ex didn’t do much to help). My kids see their dad every couple of months for a weekend. I am still single having decided to put them first while they are young. ( My oldest are 11. My youngest was born from frozen embryos I got in the split and is 2).

    My kids are doing well at school and seem happy and well adjusted. Lots of people tell me what a credit they are to me.

    Sometimes it is hard when you have noone to hand them off to , and trying to juggle finances, childcare work etc when it is a bad day.  But we are a great wee unit and a family of 5.

    If you end up single there is every chance your kid will do great. And I know mine are much better off without their cheating alcoholic father.

    Good luck.

    #61884 Report

    Marr
    Participant

    Speaking from experience as a child brought up by my mother it does. As long as you are strong, supportive, affectionate you needn’t worry. Don’t be afraid about having those hard conversations, they will help.

    I’m a full time single parent myself it is not the circumstances I’d wish to bring a child up in but I’ve had to learn on the job. I don’t want to make mistakes but I do, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

    #61900 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    Single parent families do well if not better than two parent families. Your child will grow up perfectly well. There are lots of similar families who are doing really well. Often happier and more contented. Message me if you want.

    #61905 Report

    ril06
    Participant

    I am a single parent to a 4 year old and 1 year old. It is not a situation I ever imagined I would be in but I have adapted quite quickly. It is very hard but I just make sure that my girls feel very loved and very wanted. My eldest was 3 when her dad left and she was completely heartbroken but I found just telling her a lot that I was here and I wouldn’t leave her helped. It is very hard but my children seem very happy. They are both quite independent which I think is a result of needing to share my time but they are both doing well with their development. It has made their bond with me a lot stronger.

    The thing I find the hardest is the assumption of strangers. People always seem to assume that they live with 2 parents and it’s hard seeing her face when they say something along the lines of ‘take this home for mummy and daddy’.

    #61922 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    there is a lot of research and statistics out there that state that children growing up in single parent household are more likely to be disadvantaged, compared to a 2 parent household. one article:

    A FORMER head of the schools watchdog yesterday blamed absentee fathers for the rise in gang-related violence among Britain’s youths.

    children who grow up with absent-fathers can suffer lasting damage.They are more likely to end up in poverty or drop out of school, become addicted to drugs, have a child out of wedlock, or end up in prison.

    • This reply was modified 1 month ago by steve3334.
    #61942 Report

    Ishtar
    Participant

    Steve – a lot of that research has been shown to be due not to the single parenting as such but to the fact that single parents are more likely to live in poverty that households with 2 parents. When poverty levels.are corrected for there is no evidence of a statistically significant disadvantage from being in a single parent family.

    Generally noone sets out to have kids alone but unfortunately life doesn’t always go the way we want it to. So if you do end up as single parent – father or mother – please be reassured that it is not a guaranteed cause of delinquency.

    #61943 Report

    Andrew uk
    Participant

    It depends what you mean by single-parenting. Two parents living separately or one parent and the other parent not on the scene? I have family members, joint-parenting but in separate households who are and have been thriving. Single-parenting is often the best solution and produces the most positive outcomes.

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