Do I let my partners children visit during lock down?

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  • #39013 Report


    Hi. I have remained adamant from the beginning of the lockdown that my partners children (which he legally has every Friday pm to Monday am) won’t be allowed to come to my house where he lives, along with my two children without having a week somewhere in isolation from their mums house beforehand to be as safe as possible. I am a teacher but havn’t had to go into work as yet so myself and my children have remained well isolated. On the other hand, my partners ex is not being as safe – she was taking the kids here, there and everywhere a day before official lock down and not taking things very seriously and also goes into work into a car garage they own to do paper work which I don’t think is necessary as can be done from home. They also have a half sibling in the house who is going to his Dad’s each weekend and I know nothing about that family or what they do/where they go etc. On-top of this, my partners ex lies a lot so it is very difficult to believe what she says about how they are keeping safe. My ex is not seeing my children at the moment as works as a key worker with the public so doesn’t want to put them at risk so they are doing lots of Facetime. I realise that legally children are allowed to move between households but worst case scenario is that they bring something into my house (even if A sympotomatic) and all my good work of keeping myself and my children safe ends in one of us in hospital or worse….however, I also realise the chances of them having it at exactly the time they come to stay for a while (as I absolutely won’t let them come backwards and forwards each weekend as risk is added each time) is low in reality. My partner is going to look at a static caravan tonight that will rent out for a week but it isn’t cheap and I feel like I’m making him jump through hoops to see his kids which he hasn’t seen for weeks 5 weeks now. I don’t want to be unreasonable and all my friends agree with me…but they are my friends…so it’s hard to know if they just want to support me – hence why I thought it would be useful to see what people generally think – although I imagine opinions will be very divided!! Thanks in advance for any opinion given.

    #39090 Report


    I think you should let him see his kids, think about your own kids….would you be ok if you had a different partner and he refused to let you see yours?

    I can totally see where you are coming from with your concerns though and I am not judging you for your decision. just my opinion. Hope you and all your family stay safe through these crazy times.

    #39092 Report


    Kudos to your partner for even trying to think laterally and come up with an alternative compromise …more than my kids Dad has.

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