Deciding to separate, young baby

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  • #33704 Report


    Hi I’m 45 and have just had my last baby a few months ago. I have been in a relationship with a younger man for 18 months. We got together after my husband of 20 years died suddenly of cancer, I worked with him and we became friends then more. Our relationship is very volitile and now we are separating. I’m worried that if he has access he will take the baby and not return him, or play silly games as he has lots of issues. I am worried about doing this on my own, both my parents are deceased and I have little family to help, is there any advice you can give me.

    #33794 Report


    Congratulations.  I’m sure you’ll be fine. You aren’t a first time mum and have all that experience to draw on.

    I’m an older single mum too and it is hard work. I found it helped to try to improve my fitness because then I had more energy and less sick time.

    As for the ex, don’t add him to the bc, let him apply if he wants to. Get childcare and routines in place and be guided by how he acts. Try to keep it amicable so your son has a good relationship with his dad but don’t rely on him if you can avoid it. If you are really worried, make sure you know what the law is around shared custody, and how to deal with any problems. Good luck x

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