Day 8 of Self-isolation with 2yr & 5yr old

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  • #38142 Report

    ThompsonGray
    Participant

    Hi,

    Just looking for other single parents who are in self-isolation alone with very young children.

    The Thursday Boris made the announcement that anyone presenting a cough or temp needed to self isolate, my 5 yr old came home from school with a cough. Of course this immediately meant all 3 of us had to stay home & a few days later, good ol’ Boris announced the 14 day rule. I was completely under prepared – very fortunate that my parents and ex husband have dropped shopping off – but the emotional and physical aspect of being isolated with 2 very small children is taking its toll.

     

    My youngest doesn’t sleep through the night. Both children wake at 5am (this is normal for them and I have been through every sleep training thing – I don’t need advice on it, they just are early risers) so I am shattered (I try to get an early night but 1. The housework that I don’t get done in the day needs doing when they go to bed and 2. I do still need adult convo via facetime/phone with friends and family and time to relax when they have gone to bed too)

    The kids themselves are generally coping ok – I was halfway through my Primary Teacher Training before my husband left and a Nursery nurse before that so I have strategies and resources on top of the usual kids toys and telly to keep them entertained. To be honest, I am enjoying the opportunity to spend time playing with them that I usually wouldn’t have.

    I’m just so exhausted! To the point I am starting to find it difficult to function, I’m getting cranky and snapping at the kids. The kids themselves have started to exert unexpected behaviour. As the weeks gone on they are both craving more and more attention from me. My 5 year old is all over me and acting up when I have to change my 2yr olds nappy or put him down for a nap, it’s as though she feels her nose is pushed out. I make sure during my son’s nap that I dedicate time to just her (5yr old) playing whatever she wants to, in order to ‘fill her cup up’ a bit – I understand that it must be hard for her as my youngest needs more support with things and so it seems like he is getting more of my attention. But under these circumstances I feel my patience really wearing thin with my eldest’s attention seeking – it’s exhausting me emtionally.

    I’m so shattered, mentally drained and stranglely lonely – I am considering breaking self isolating! My daughter still only has a flemmy cough – I feel like if they could go and spend a night or 2 at their Dad’s it would make all the difference.

     

    I’m also starting to get angry – so many other people I know have kids with a ‘new cough’ or fever or have a cough themselves and they are not self-isolating!

    I feel that if Boris had told us to self isolate all at the same time, I would have at least chosen to go to my parents and have had more support in caring for the children.

     

    Is anyone else self isolating with small children? How are you feeling? How are you coping?

    #38170 Report

    Oatcake
    Participant

    Hi,

    I’m in self isolation with my 3 year old, nearly 2 year old and 4 month old and it is so hard!

    Like you I feel shattered and drained. I’m really struggling to give them all enough one on one time which is really affecting their moods and behaviour. So on top of everything I feel like I’m failing them. My 3 year old just started nursery in January which made such a difference and we were all much happier, so going back to not having that has been very challenging.

    I left all my housework tonight as I just could not face it. But I know I’m going to regret it so much in the morning! I can’t seem to “embrace the mess” as is often advised! So I guess it’s just trying to find the right balance between housework and rest/ sleep.

    This is such a testing time for everyone but we are strong and will come out of this even stronger. That’s what I keep telling myself, though I know it’s hard to see at the moment! I wish I could give you some advice on how to get through it! I hope knowing you’re not the only one feeling like that will help a little.

    #38180 Report

    ThompsonGray
    Participant

    Oatcake! Oh my! I really feel for you! What is your support network like?

    The whole ’embrace the mess’ concept is a lovely idea but I feel it’s unpractical – the mess can quickly get to dangerous levels and also, I simply don’t have enough pots to feed us, for example at tea time, if I haven’t washed up from lunch.

    Its really good to know that I’m not the only single parent feeling like this in these circumstances. With a 4 month old, I would seriously be considering breaking Self-isolation just to take them out on the car or for a walk.

    I’m sick of seeing the memes saying ‘we’re all in this together’ yet I look out of my window and see a the kids and parents from our estate having a BBQ and picnic on the fields near out house. I think the exhaustion is exacerbating my anger. I’m happy to do my bit, I feel very fortunate that I am not an NHS worker struggling to buy food, work and find childcare for example, but this staggered approach to slowing the spread has left so many people self-isolating in ways which are not appropriate because they haven’t had time to prepare!

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