Coping when your kids seem to prefer the other parent

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  • #11575 Report

    Carmilla
    Participant

    Hi,

    New here, maybe ill say more about myself later on (does anyone ever worry their exes might be on here???).

    For now, i just wondered how people cope or what you can do when you child doesnt want to be with you?

    My little girl is only 15 months and shes my little world. I have her 50/50 with her Dad and consider us both good parents with a lot of love for her.

    However, last night collecting her from a weekend with her dad, she reach out for her grandparents and dad over me when i tried to hold her. I tried to act all light hearted like it was ok ‘aww mummys not that bad’ kind of thing. Then she started crying out ‘no,no,no dada!’ To go back to him as i walked out the door.

    I couldnt help but break down in the car. I know shes only little but its crushed me and im findin it really hard to get over. But as my ex said, its probably going to get far worse, especially when shes old enough to decide who she does and doesnt want to stay with.

    I tried to do the right thing by everyone in separating, but after that i can see why some people just try and stay as a family unit regardless.

    #11588 Report

    RobBob
    Participant

    I can tell you with absolute honesty, this is not something to worry about. My little girl is now 4 yrs and this exact same thing happened. When the couple is together the children may want either parent at any given point, there’s nothing in it. When my ex was putting daughter in car seat she called for me I told her off a little and said mummys helping you stop being silly. Talk to your ex about it. It doesn’t last and kids don’t have favourites, ESPECIALLY not at that age. It may very well be the other way round soon, she may struggle to go to father, it goes in phases.

    I bet your daughter was fine after a few minutes with you? it always is. Please dont doubt yourself, she has a mother and father that love her, she’ll be just fine, and so will you. Relax.

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