My normally fiercely independent 17 month old has been incredibly emotionally demanding for almost two weeks now. He’s not feeling well. I thought he had chicken pox and when they didn’t develop took him to gp and turns out it’s an ear infection. Course of anti biotics started today. He’s been very clingy and needs me to hold him and be with him constantly which im not used to and dont cope well with. The pressure is crippling me. I’m an introvert and loud noises make me want to run a mile so you can imagine when my son is crying at me because he’s unwell it feels like the hardest thing in the world to pick him up and be there. Every ounce of my being wants to run and hide in a quiet room. Of course I do I hold him and tell him it’ll be okay and he’ll be better soon but inside im thinking ‘please please please stop I can’t take this I can’t take anymore crying’ normally I love being a single mum and feel like me and my boy have such a wonderful time together but it all crumbles when he demands ‘too much’ of me…I can t help but feel I shouldn’t have limits for my child! He should be able to feel how he needs to feel and I should be there to hold him while he feels it. Then the guilt sets in and I feel I’ve failed him. I’ve shouted at him to stop a few times over the last few weeks and I’ve realised when I say that I’m not shouting at him to stop feeling his feelings I’m shouting because the noise makes me want to flee and it makes me feel like more is being asked of me than I have to give. I get this every time he is ill. Does anyone else feel like this when their children are being emotionally demanding ? Any tips for coping when what you really need is to take 5 but can’t
I can resonate with you. My son is emotionally demanding since the first day. So it is in his nature. I used to raise my voice and sometimes shouting at him, when I couldn’t cope with his demand. Then I would feel really bad afterwards. What helped me is that I realize I need a bit of space of my own. So I regularly have nanny coming over to take him completely out of my sight, and give myself a break for half a day or even a whole day. This helps me to rebalance and replenish my emotions.