Contact with key worker father

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    peanuts82
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    My ex is a key worker at the docks.  Although I’m healthy at the moment I have had severe issues a few years ago that effected my lung muscles.

    For both of these reasons both my ex and myself made the decision for my daughter to stay with me and if she was to see her dad to do it at a social distance.

    We made the decision via text so I have a trail of this arrangement.

     

    So the issue is both me and my girlfriend are teachers/students so are working/studying from home. she doesn’t live with me but I see her every day and we decided to self isolate with my daughter together.

     

    My ex doesn’t like this arrangement and although we agreed to social distance contact, he’s refusing to come to my home or for me to drop her outside his home for social distance contact. He actually text my daughter with ‘ No way im coming to the house with mum and mummy there!’ and various homophobic, unhelpful comments.

    We just came to the conclusion that this is his decision and left the social distance contact option open to him, which he hasn’t taken up. My daughter is 13 so has communicated via text and phone calls.

    This week my daughter started getting upset wanting to see her dad, I contacted him today and he has demanded that she comes to his house to stay telling me its his right and that Im keeping him away from his daughter.

     

    Ive basically said no and he tells me I can’t do this.

     

    We don’t have a court arrangement, we only have a separation arrangement that states he have one weekend a month (due to his job this is all he can guarantee).

    Now even though he has one weekend a month, under normal circumstances this is very relaxed and he sees her regually when it suits both him and my daughter. usually one night a week, sometimes none and sometimes a few nights so its very varied and flexible. Not ideal as I would like structure and continuity but I have been flexible to accommodate his job.

    Now where do I stand with regards to keeping him from having her overnight? All I want is to keep myself, my daughter and those around me safe. Under normal circumstances this wouldn’t be an issue 🙁
    He’s threatening to stop child maintenance also.

     

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