Contact arrangements so annoying

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  • #28721 Report

    Flynn1994
    Participant

    Hi I’m new here. I’m looking for some advice things are so frustrating me and my ex seperated over two years ago we split on two occasions due to myself and my ex not getting on he was convicted in court proven guilty of domestic violence he was in our sons life up until before our son turned 1 year old we then got back together just before my son turned two which only lasted 6 months until my ex cheated and slept with his manager who he’s with now I caught him out he was going down the wrong path drinking coming in all hours wasn’t taking our son while I tryed getting back into work myself wasn’t doing enough on top of that I had him relying on his mother financially even though he just got a job a month before we split just before the second domestic he was convicted child protection got involved I walked away with our son as social works exact words were he still has rights to seeing his child I went to three separate lawyers before the domestic was taking place and after when we split 2 weeks after we split as agreed once his bail was dropped I would go through the right channels to allow our child to safely see his father my ex got his manager the girl he was seeing pregnant two weeks after leaving me now this was all taking place in September 2017 now two year nearly on my ex has done nothing but lie through his teeth I arranged for him to see our son through his mum in December 2017 never turned up for then arranged again at some point in 2018 I had abusive messeges about my career benefit scrounger called me fat ugly the list goes on everytime he never got his own way he would lie to his mum claiming money was removed my child maintenance just so his mother could give him money used our son as a way my ex use to have issues with gambling and taking cocaine while on nights out away from me his full focus was on his new begining now but he’s not involving or allowing our son to have a part in his new situation my main worry was incase he was still being like that so recently this year 2019 he passed my mum in the street pleaded to see our son I gave him a chance it worked on 3 occasions he doesn’t support me financially he’s £1000 in debt in child maintenance asks me for money during contact even though he works he’s now just had another 2 kids (twins) not seen our son in over a month doesn’t text or call to see how our son his even though I’ve told him our sons had medical issues in regards to his health it’s like my ex is just showing of messing our sons head I don’t know what Todo 😣

    He’s cancelling contact also keeps arranging last month 4 occasions changed in June

     

    Edit also my ex has a older daughter to who he has signed the birth certificate she’s 8 and our sons only 4 and another 3 two at 24 years old 😒 life’s like easy for him it’s just not fair on any the kids

    • This topic was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by Flynn1994.
    • This topic was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by Flynn1994. Reason: Missed something out
    #28724 Report

    Flynn1994
    Participant

    Sorry 5 kids in total now

    #28725 Report

    Kathymumofone
    Participant

    I know you are trying to arrange contact, to comply with a court order and to try to allow a relationship between father & son. It’s good that you have tried.

    After this time, I think I’d leave it to your ex to make contact, to avoid disappointing your son.

    You say the father is unreliable, dishonest, has problems with drugs and alcohol, doesn’t pay child support and tries to borrow money from you. Perhaps it’s time to step back and leave it to him to make the running.  As you say, it isn’t fair on your son.

    #28957 Report

    Flynn1994
    Participant

    Thankyou for your support I’ve blocked my ex via Facebook seeing that he’s getting on with life is good but also sad as my son’s left out it’s only going to make matters worse me dwelling on it I’ve got his mobile and he has mine so there is option to contact but in the meantime I’ve herd nothing I don’t intend to follow that up as I’ve done enough on my be half I can’t force him x

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