confused what to do next.

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  • #45086 Report



    I am hoping someone can give me some advice. 4 weeks ago me and my husband seperated.I have told him i will take over the rent etc for the house but he wont move out….he keeps saying he cant afford it.I know he can and i have offered to help with the cost also but he wont move.We have 2 children and in the past 4 weeks he has seen them for a matter of hours.He is always out of the house weather it be work or seeing friends etc which is fine but the youngest is 6 and he is starting to ask questions about why daddy doesnt do homework or tea or bedtime anymore (we use to take it in  turns to do these things). my family have told me he is treating the house like a hotel which i see now and i also think he has a touch of depression. He wont talk at all, doesnt ask about the kids…absolutely nothing. He eats takeout every night,he wont take the kids out (but he sees his son from his previous relationship often and speaks to him on the phone alot).

    I love my kids and love been a mum but the kids also need routine and consistency and at the moment its not happening.

    I hope this is making sense?

    thankyou x

    #45091 Report


    Hi,if your partner is on the rental agreement or mortgage you can’t force him out the house,this is still early days in separation and he may be struggling to accept that the relationship is over,you won’t get consistency until you two can sit down and talk this are quick to judge as they will always tell you what you want to here,but you need to remember is a relationship break up affects everyone differently

    #45095 Report


    Hello Sue,

    Speak to your Landlord or letting agent. Tell them what is going on and ask them for a new rental agreement. It is a bit of a risk but if they go along with it, it is an easy way out.

    Give him notice, change the locks. Police will usually not become involved.

    You can’t change him so you have to deal with what you are presented with. Tell the children it will be alright and that he is just a busy and confused. Once you have cleared the situation, you can get into more detail.

    Sounds like a lot of suffering on all sides.

    Good luck


    #45103 Report


    Hi, myself and my husband have separated, we have been unhappy together for a long time and are more like good friends.

    but I really need some advice my husband gave his job up 5 years ago to help care for our autistic son as I was on the verge of a breakdown and struggling to cope with him as well as the death of our son.

    My husband has slept downstairs for a long long time and has himself suffered with depression since being of work, however he can not afford to move out untill he is established back into work,

    What I’m struggling to find out is would my rent be covered if he stays here as this is such a worry for me.
    we deal with my son well together but as a relationship it has just run it’s course.

    any advice would be greatly received.

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